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what the actual fuck happened to me last night!

(35 Posts)
footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 11:49:53

Just that really, been seeing a guy for 3 months we both seemed equally into each other. Started sleeping together after date 8 then spent almost every night at each others. Late last night knock at his door and next thing I know his ex came into the kitchen to me and said he is still sleeping with me. he rang me last week and came round and we had sex and he was taking me for dinner the next night.
Of course I was just shell shocked I went upstairs and got my stuff and left them to it arguing. As I walked out the house she grabbed me and hugged me and said I am so sorry. I then had to go and get a cab and he never even checked I got home safely! ( 5 miles from home) what a bastard but still feel hurt by it all.

ImperialBlether Sun 25-Sep-16 12:00:57

She really did you the biggest favour. What a cheating bastard that man is.

MatildaTheCat Sun 25-Sep-16 12:03:10

Let's hope she's dumped him too.

Lying cheat. Hope you feel better soon because you've clearly dodged a bullet.

gamerchick Sun 25-Sep-16 12:04:11

Looks like you're the one who had the lucky escape. Doesn't make it hurt any less though sad flowers


I agree that she's done you a favour, but I'd want to slap her for the hug. That's pretty manipulative. Stay well out of it.

springydaffs Sun 25-Sep-16 12:11:31

Bloody hell, human kindness is apparently manipulative hmm

Maybe it was kindness, and I'm just too cynical - some people actively enjoy hurting others and then being all head-tilty and fake sympathetic. I'm not very touchy feely with strangers though. I'd flinch. Not that it's relevant really.

footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 12:23:50

The hug felt so wrong but I am was too shocked to react and actually hugged her back!
Matilda she hasnt dumped him because stupidly I rang him about an 11/2hrs later to try and find out what was going on and she was still there
It's good I found out but it is really hurting as we had made plans for Christmas etc

ZippyNeedsFeeding Sun 25-Sep-16 12:24:14

I'm really sorry this happened, but at least you found out fairly early on. Don't give their dramas any more headspace. For all you know, this could be a regular cycle for them and you are far better off out of it.

youarenotkiddingme Sun 25-Sep-16 12:24:56

Hang on. I'm all for LTB if necessary but is there actual evidence he is still sleeping with ex or is she being a shit stirrer hence his arguing?

The not contacting you is shit - but if she's lied and you believed her maybe he feels it's pointless?

footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 12:26:08

I had met all his family too and he was just perfect until last night. Never put a foot wrong, looked after me when I was ill, always went the extra mile

QueenLizIII Sun 25-Sep-16 12:26:15

The hug suggests to me that she is happy.

Glad she has got him back. She fucked him when she knew about you clearly and wanted to break you two up so she could get him to herself.

Well done OP for getting your stuff and leaving.

She sounds as bad as he does. Hope she is happy now.

Penfold007 Sun 25-Sep-16 12:26:21

Did he admit he was still seeing/sleeping with her?

QueenLizIII Sun 25-Sep-16 12:28:05

Even if he did deny it, could you handle the drama of this?

footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 12:29:46

Penfold yes he told me when I rang that it was true. She has a man but refuses to leave him but apparently they had agreed last week to finish it with us and get together and she had turned up to say she had done it. She told me that not him

QueenLizIII Sun 25-Sep-16 12:31:13

Oh jesus.

well rid.

benbry Sun 25-Sep-16 12:31:35

You're collateral damage in her plans, that's all.

If he hasn't been in touch you are well rid, and yes of course she was being manipulative.

footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 12:32:51

No Queen I couldnt and could never trust him either.
I left loads of stuff there that I lent him for a party he said he will drop it over today but no sign yet. I will feel like slapping him when I see him!

benbry Sun 25-Sep-16 12:34:12

So sorry OP. They sound well suited, his loss.

QueenLizIII Sun 25-Sep-16 12:36:47

God I dont blame you.

Keep cool.

The one thing I have always regretted in break ups is ever showing any emotion at all.

Just act as if they are so asinine as to be of no consequence at all to you.

BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 25-Sep-16 12:43:30

Hug was weird. She sounds awful!

flowers for you OP.

footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 12:52:13

Thanks Being and everyone else, feel a bit better talking about it I havent told any of my friends yet they all thought he was perfect sad

footballcrazy11 Sun 25-Sep-16 13:00:44

I forgot to say she actually grabbed my hand and held it when she said she had slept with him last week shock

BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 25-Sep-16 13:02:12

I repeat, she sounds awful!

He is worse though because he was the cheater. Better off without.

ladylambkin Sun 25-Sep-16 13:03:49

Sorry that this happened to you OP I know it hurts but she did you a favour. They both sound as bad as each other

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