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Going on a date with NO money?

(175 Posts)
HerFaceIsAMapOfTheWorld Sat 24-Sep-16 16:01:15

My friend thinks it is acceptable to go on a date with 0 in my pocket.

I have a new guy in my life and he has invited me out tonight, I literally have 0 in my account until Monday so I declined. Whilst I believe that if a guy invites you out he should pay I wouldn't ever leave the house without money, you just don't know what will happen.

She is telling me I am being stupid and I will lose him if I keep declining dates, its only been twice.

What do you think about this?

Vixxfacee Sat 24-Sep-16 16:02:01

I wouldn't either.

mumofone1234 Sat 24-Sep-16 16:04:27

I agree with your friend. It would be acceptable if you told him the situation and he was happy to treat you.

mumofone1234 Sat 24-Sep-16 16:05:59

re the 'you don't know what will happen' don't you have a credit card or overdraft for emergencies?

alafolie29 Sat 24-Sep-16 16:07:36

I wouldn't either, purely in case you needed money in an emergency. However, if you do actually want to go out with him, I would reschedule for a time you know you will have money. Otherwise I think he will (rightly) think you're not interested.

QuiteLikely5 Sat 24-Sep-16 16:08:55

Can't she lend you the money

Freshprincess Sat 24-Sep-16 16:09:18

Me neither. I wouldn't go out without enough to money for a taxi home at the least.
I wouldn't be impressed with anyone turning up with 0p expecting someone else to pay or everything.

Luvjubs Sat 24-Sep-16 16:10:30

I'd say that I'd love to but had an expensive month this month and don't get paid until Monday, but would make sure I actively rearrange for another time.

Starryeyed16 Sat 24-Sep-16 16:12:54

My DH asked me out on a date and I didn't have the funds as I waiting on pay day he said it was his treat, we had a bloody good time, been together 6 years and married for 2.

SheldonsSpot Sat 24-Sep-16 16:12:59

I wouldn't go on a date with no money.

I would decline but rearrange for when I know I'll have money.

I wouldn't tell him "I can't, I'm skint". It's too early to start chatting finances and if I'm honest, I would find a date telling me "I'm skint, I literally don't have a penny till Monday" massively off-putting, sorry.

No, I wouldn't go out with no money, I'd feel a bit vulnerable. I also wouldn't expect someone to pay for me all night because they were the one who'd suggested a night out either. Unless it was a special treat (birthday meal/surprise) I've always gone halves.

DonkeyHotay Sat 24-Sep-16 16:16:45

Why should men pay for a date? I'd expect to pay half or, at a push, take turns.

I'd say you can't make it and ask to make an alternative arrangement straight away.

HerFaceIsAMapOfTheWorld Sat 24-Sep-16 16:18:12

Well I told him I am going out with my friends tonight, he just asked me today so was nothing planned.
I don't have a credit card or overdraft

billynomates26 Sat 24-Sep-16 16:18:14

I wouldn't either, but I'd of been up front about why and if he really wants to go (likes you all that) he might say he doesn't mind and you could just say you'll take him out next week to treat him. Then hopefully you'll get a second date!

Floggingmolly Sat 24-Sep-16 16:24:36

You believe that if a guy asks you out he should pay??

Claramarion Sat 24-Sep-16 16:25:27

If have enough money to at least buy a round and get my self home should things go tits up !

sonlypuppyfat Sat 24-Sep-16 16:28:18

I've had right old tellings off on here before, but I've never ever ever paid for anything on a date

BlasianFashionista Sat 24-Sep-16 16:28:42

HerFaceIsAMapOfTheWorld I am totally with you on this one, I would never go on a date knowing that I didn't have any money, suppose something went wrong and you wanted to leave, how would you get home?!

PaperdollCartoon Sat 24-Sep-16 16:30:15

Maybe I'm overly up front, but if I was seeing someone I liked and had no money (a very realistic prospect when I was single!) I would say 'I'd love to see you but I have literally no money, so either let's do something free or you can buy me a drink and I'll buy you one next time'. Assuming you can get home of course and wouldn't be relying on him for that in case something should go wrong. What's wrong with that?

Summerisdone Sat 24-Sep-16 16:35:56

mumofone believe it or not, but many of us don't have the luxury to be able to rely on a credit card or overdraft for emergencies. For myself, if I haven't got money in my current account or purse then I literally have nothing, I don't have a credit card or anything else as I know that I couldn't fit into my budget to payoff what I've spent on it.
In regards to the actual post; OP I'm completely with you as I too couldn't bring myself to go on a date without any money, and I also couldn't be honest about why I'm not going that early on in the relationship either as then I'd feel like he's been forced into a position to offer to pay and I wouldn't feel comfortable with admitting to how skint I am either

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Sat 24-Sep-16 16:39:16

Thing is, you can't assume they're going to pay so of course you can't go out with £0. But if you like him, then rearrange for next week.

AyeAmarok Sat 24-Sep-16 16:39:54

Whilst I believe that if a guy invites you out he should pay



If your best mate invited you out to the pub for a drink and a catch-up would you also expect her to pay? Or is it just the having of a penis that means you think he should pay?

needastrongone Sat 24-Sep-16 16:44:01


I'm glad some folk have picked up on this too, why should the guy pay if he asks you out OP?

bananafish Sat 24-Sep-16 16:45:40

No - that's definitely the right call. You don't want to be dependent on someone you don't know for money. It's fine if they offer to pay - I don't think I've ever dated anyone who would expect, or want, me to 'go halves' if they've invited me out. - but that's very different to needing them to buy everything.

Rafflesway Sat 24-Sep-16 16:51:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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