Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Joint bank account...what if???

(127 Posts)
Upandaway0987 Sat 24-Sep-16 08:53:45

Your OH took 2000 pounds out of your joint bank and didn't discuss it with you would you do? Would you expect him or her to discuss it with you first?

AgentProvocateur Sat 24-Sep-16 08:55:28

Depends what he/she used it for? A surprise holiday - fine. A night at the casino - not fine.

ShatterResistant Sat 24-Sep-16 08:57:17

Yes. That kind of money doesn't go anywhere without discussion and decision. Why do you ask?

FaithLoveandHope Sat 24-Sep-16 08:58:59

I would definitely expect him to discuss it with me first. Although we do have individual accounts as well as our joint. The joint is used for bills and rent and then any big joint purchases we discuss first and each add more to the joint if necessary. Anything else we pay for out of our separate accounts so I'd be pretty pissed off if he took out 2000 from our joint without discussing it first. I guess it depends on your setup though?

AyeAmarok Sat 24-Sep-16 09:00:06

Yes, of course I'd expect a discussion for that sum of money.

Is it more likely to be for an engagement ring, or something not so good?

NerrSnerr Sat 24-Sep-16 09:01:06

It depends what £2000 means to you. For us that is loads of money and I would expect it to be discussed.

Upandaway0987 Sat 24-Sep-16 09:01:08

H had done it, not discussed it - just gone ahead and done it and still not said anything now. I found out via the bank. Wondering what other peoples views were

DollyBarton Sat 24-Sep-16 09:02:53

What was it used for? In our house he would likely say it to me but we shift money around our accounts all the time, it might not even noticed.

AppleJac Sat 24-Sep-16 09:05:22

You need to ask him what it was for and then go from there

NerrSnerr Sat 24-Sep-16 09:07:16

Have you asked him what he's done with it?

PotteringAlong Sat 24-Sep-16 09:07:41

Depends what he's done with it. Shifted to another account because he realised it had higher interest? Fine. Surprise holiday? Fine but I might be a bit twitchy. 4000 packets of scampi fries? Not ok.

Upandaway0987 Sat 24-Sep-16 09:08:21

We have our own accounts, joint is for all bills, house etc. H has moved the money to his own account. I always talk to him about what we do with our joint money, any big purchase etc

Nakupenda Sat 24-Sep-16 09:09:57

I'd be okay with 4000 packets of scampi fries. I'd eat every packet in silent protest.

Seriously though, why not just ask him? If your relationship is in fine nick why not ask him instead of a forum of strangers?

If the joint account is for joint money it's not okay to take £2k without so much as a passing comment on why.

Upandaway0987 Sat 24-Sep-16 09:12:07

Can't ask him, he's away. I'm so cross and upset

PotteringAlong Sat 24-Sep-16 09:12:19

If he's moved it all to his account then I'd say he was preparing to leave you.

NormaStanleyFletcher Sat 24-Sep-16 09:13:27

You have to talk about this.

Is there any reason you feel you can't?

YouAreMyRain Sat 24-Sep-16 09:14:01

Sadly I agree with pottering. Where is he? Who with?

NerrSnerr Sat 24-Sep-16 09:14:23

Is he not contactable at all? Not even via text or email? If just send a message saying what was that £2k for?

pollyblack Sat 24-Sep-16 09:14:50

Yes i'd be worried about this. We generally discuss anything over an "everyday" purchase.

RedMapleLeaf Sat 24-Sep-16 09:16:24

How much is left? £2k is worth about two months of my bills and would be the most I'd keep in there.

RedMapleLeaf Sat 24-Sep-16 09:17:11

How far away is he? Can't you just ask?

NerrSnerr Sat 24-Sep-16 09:17:19

Could there be a rational explanation? Do you have credit cards or loans that he took the money out to pay off and he forgot to tell you?

AnyFucker Sat 24-Sep-16 09:19:13

Unless he is a submariner or peace keeping in Aleppo or summat of course you can ask him.

tribpot Sat 24-Sep-16 09:24:45

Yes, key first thing is whether or not there is enough money in the account to cover the monthly bills. If no, WTF is he doing.

If yes, why has the money been moved to his account where you don't have access to it? And what was the money earmarked for? My budget doesn't have 'unallocated savings', it has categories for things like emergency fund, household repairs, car repairs - so stuff that could be spent but might also not be. If the money merely moves account it hasn't been removed from its fund but both partners have to understand the budget to appreciate this isn't just free-floating money, it has a purpose.

itlypocerka Sat 24-Sep-16 09:27:50

If he's away is it possible that he doesn't know about this and has had a card cloned? Could you have been robbed? You need to speak to him ASAP!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now