I'm feeling really alone at the moment.
Me and my DH have been TTC over the last 2-3 months. Not long I know. Anyway a couple of weeks ago I'd convinced myself I was pregnant. Spent £20 on tests to go home to find my period had arrived. That was 11 days ago, I was feeling sad for the first couple of days. 7 days ago my best friend text me telling me she was pregnant. Happy for her but I was welling up all day at work, upset because it hadn't happened for me. I've been up and down ever since then. Found I've been better when I've had things to do like being at work. Sunday had nothing planned so turned into a moping day.
Been fine yesterday and today, up until 4.30pm today when my DH rang me at work with some bad news about a pay rise he was getting (still getting it but not as much as we thought for the first 6 months). This sent me over the edge. It's not even about the pay rise, it stems back to not being pregnant. Came back from work, he knew I was pissed off. I normally go to slimming world on a Tuesday. Went and had a bath then got ready to go to class. I asked if he would put my dinner in the oven whilst I was out. He was being arsey which caused me to start crying. I went and got weighed (trying not to cry), then came straight back and come to bed.
I've cried my eyes out, he has heard me. He hasn't been there for me once during the last 11 days. I have no one to speak to. Can't tell my best friend because I don't want her to feel like it's her fault. It's an exciting time and I don't want to put a downer on things. I just don't know what to do. I want to snap out of it, I really do. I just want a cuddle and someone to tell me everything will be okay.
I'm sorry for the essay.
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Feeling Alone
5 replies
Mummyh2016 · 20/09/2016 20:50
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