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Relationships

I don't know how to keep on going ..

14 replies

sadallthetimexx · 15/09/2016 13:21

I just want or need someone to talk to really.
I feel so incredibly alone.
I've got no family really.
I had 3 friends but 1 or 2 of them I don't think are real friends.
1 friend always used me for money and randomly stopped speaking to me.
It's been 3 months and she has turned our mutual friends against me..1 of them actually walked past me in the street.

I was upset so I messaged a other "friend" and told her what just happened her reply was "and" so I said well it's a bit shitty don't you think..her reply was "yup"
Basically she couldn't give a shit about me,not just on this occasion but unless it's about her she ain't interested.
She's made new friends and doesn't need to me now,that's clear to see.
A ex ended things last year..was in love with him.
Turned out he had a gf and kids all the long.
So not only do people not like me I'm a mug to.

I'm so low I just want to stay in the house forever and never leave.
I feel so empty..lost..I don't even know anymore how I feel.
I'm sick of crying.
I'm trying to be happy and suggest things to do with this friend but she makes excuses.
They are going on a night out but I wasn't invited.
I'm sick Of my life..if this is it what's the point.

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ThumbWitchesAbroad · 15/09/2016 13:24

So sorry you're feeling this way.
I would suggest first and foremost that you go to the doctor and talk to them about how you're feeling, and discuss whether or not you might have depression, or something else.

Next, I would forget about the "friends" you used to have and concentrate on finding some new ones - but I think it would help you to like yourself first, as people do pick up on negative vibes and react to them.

What do you do for fun? Do you have a hobby? What do you do for work? Do you meet people there?

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sadallthetimexx · 15/09/2016 13:27

Don't have any hobbys.
Was all set to enroll on a college course but it got canceled due to funding.
I lost my job 2 months ago.
I worked at bhs.
Got to know people but they never became "friends"

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hellsbellsmelons · 15/09/2016 13:50

I agree - see your GP.
You could have depression and you may need some help.
Don't suffer on your own, get all the help and support that is offered.

Have you been applying for new jobs?
Going round other shops and handing out CV's?
Local pubs maybe, you get to know so many people working in a pub.
Registered with local employment agencies?

You need new friends.
Have a look at your local meetup.com and join a few clubs (when you feel up to it) and meet like minded people.

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sadallthetimexx · 15/09/2016 14:11

I haven't even applied for any new jobs.
I have No motivation to do anything apart from wallow.
I've been washing my hair for a week ..still haven't done it.
It's just all pointless,nobody is going to see it anyway.
I don't even know if I'm this sad over the guy or its more than that.

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hellsbellsmelons · 15/09/2016 14:29

It's more than that from what you are saying.
Make an appointment with the GP.
You won't want to but you really need to.
No matter what people say, you don't just 'get over' depression.
You will need some help.
Don't deny yourself - go and get it!

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MatildaTheCat · 15/09/2016 14:29

You need an urgent GP appooitment, you sound very depressed. Do you have anyone in RL to talk to? If not there is heaps of support here.

Maybe you would like a change of career or focus? Is there anything you are especially interested in? When you feel a bit better maybe get some career advice. Volunteering is great while you are unemployed and a good way of meeting people.

Hope you feel better soon.

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PinkSquash · 15/09/2016 14:31

Please see your GP, it's a hard step but you have a reason then to wash your hair, get dressed and gives you someone to talk to for a few minutes.

I have to do the same this afternoon, I'm finally taking my own advice after feeling broken for so long.

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sadallthetimexx · 15/09/2016 14:45

I try and talk to the friend I sent the message too earlier but she isn't interested.
I just get "sorry got to do the dishes" or " oh well best get moving"
I tried talking to my dad but he just said I need to get a grip or lock myself in the house out of the way.
I can't stop looking at ex Facebook profile,every day about 20 times.
I'm not sure if I'm even depressed I just feel so empty ..everything just seems like an effort.
Every day is the same,I could get hit by a bus and not 1 person would care.

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PinkSquash · 15/09/2016 14:51

Block his profile, you're just tormenting yourself for no reason, you cannot heal while you keep checking. It's hard, but it's something you really have to do

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skyyequake · 15/09/2016 15:02

Emptiness and lack of interest (like hobbies and career wise) are classic signs of depression.

You're torturing yourself looking up your Ex, he was an asshole and you deserve better, as do his gf and kids. Do you think his gf is "a mug" or in anyway deserving of this crap? because he did exactly the same to her... It's nothing to do with either of you, he's just a knob unfortunately.

Try talking to your GP or you can look up Mind which is a charity for mental illnesses, including depression and anxiety.

I had exactly your issues when I was depressed, I didn't want to leave the house, put off washing my hair, couldn't motivate myself to look for jobs, or do anything really, even things I previously enjoyed a lot... I had depression and whilst I managed to get out of it myself, I wish I had gotten help as it would have gone so much quicker. I still struggle with it now and would be much better off with a support system.

Flowers you can fight this, you are stronger than you think

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sadallthetimexx · 15/09/2016 16:23

I'm just so upset that a so called mutual friend walked past me in the street.
I've never done anything to deserve that.

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skyyequake · 15/09/2016 17:29

Some people are just assholes OP
Not a reflection on you at all

Treat yourself OP
Run yourself a bubble bath, or take a nice long hot shower
Have candles burning
Have lots of Chocolate and Brew
Wear some clothes you really love
You don't have to leave the house
No one has to see you
You will see you
And only your opinion matters
So feel good for you not for anyone else
Do yourself up really nice
And then sit on the sofa and watch your favourite film
And feel good about just being you
Without worrying about what anyone else thinks
Even just for a night

You will get there eventually Flowers

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niceupthedance · 15/09/2016 18:08

I went through quite a long period of depression and eventually my friends didn't know how to help me so they just walked away. It was horrible. But I did need help to stop the negative thinking cycle and I think you do too. CBT can help stop you obsessing over your ex for example.

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sadallthetimexx · 15/09/2016 18:12

Thankyou I hope things get better soon.
Think I might do some online shopping (not that I need anything new) but so what.
It has felt lately just one thing after the other.
With 1 friend in particular she has a new flavour of the month every month and your well forgot about.

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