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Are apologies no longer necessary?

(9 Posts)
imnotapotato Fri 09-Sep-16 10:39:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Groovee Fri 09-Sep-16 10:41:05

I'm finding more and more people will not accept responsibility for their actions and act the victim expecting an apology.

imnotapotato Fri 09-Sep-16 10:42:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Go find new family, you FoO (and friends of) sounds dreadful.

General thoughtlessness is bad enough, but the airport thing was an elaborate (and transparent) lie - I'd be pissed off at the insult to my intelligence more than my afternoon off!

And the thing with your parents - well, clearly it's not a matter of apologies not being important, given how they're demanding one off you. angry

AttilaTheMeerkat Fri 09-Sep-16 11:01:29

I would cut back all visits and communications to your parents as of now. They are not nice people to be at all around; infact your mother is acting as her DHs willing enabler. They have likely also been like this as well; it is not your fault that they are like this. Their own families did that lot of damage to them.

I would also examine your role within your own family of origin; were you brought up to be their scapegoat for all their inherent ills?. Are siblings treated differently?

Read up also on people pleasing.

As for the man who cut the friendship he has really done you a favour by doing that because it saves you having to do that task yourself.

There are kind and decent people out there who do not act in the ways these people have done.

TheSparrowhawk Fri 09-Sep-16 11:02:53

You're unlucky that your parents are nasty and your friend's a fuckwit.

There are nice people out there, people who make a mistake and just say 'sorry,' but you have to ditch the fuckwits who weigh you down in order to have the energy and space to find them.

imnotapotato Fri 09-Sep-16 11:16:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AttilaTheMeerkat Fri 09-Sep-16 11:19:52

This family friend is a friend of your parents, he is just as grabby and self serving as they are. These types of disordered of thinking people tend to seek out others like them.

And what TheSparrowhawk wrote in its entirety.

AttilaTheMeerkat Fri 09-Sep-16 11:22:06

My mum isn't an innocent enabler though - a few years ago I asked her why she never apologised for anything and she replied: "because I'm the mum, I don't."

I described your mother as his willing enabler. She is therefore just as culpable as your dad, she is certainly not innocent at all. Your mother probably also goes along with him also out of self preservation and want of a quiet life.

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