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You know if you met 'the one'

(38 Posts)
ArthurFoulkesayce Tue 06-Sep-16 08:31:27

When did you know? Was it straight away?

Do/did they know that you knew?
Did practicalities go out of the window like some of these magazine stories I hear (doctors waiting room, I sold my mansion to live in a mud hut for love type thing) confused

I'm single just asking because I can't imagine ever meeting someone and I'd love to know if it happens smile
Plus I thought it was a cheerful thread?

dietborebingo Tue 06-Sep-16 08:37:19

I knew DH as a work colleague for 5 years before we dated. I had no idea he was "the one" before we dated!

DoubleCarrick Tue 06-Sep-16 08:40:39

I met dh online. During the date he told me a story about how his grandpop saw a woman across a room at a party and that he told his friend he'd marry her. He did. I then went home and told my housemate that I'd just met the man I was going to marry. He's now dh and he recently told me that he told me the story because he felt like his grandpop did when we met(if that makes sense)

DoubleCarrick Tue 06-Sep-16 08:41:08

It should say during our first date

BendydickCuminsnatch Tue 06-Sep-16 08:43:12

Yes, when I first set eyes on DH it was honestly like there was a white glow around him shock I've heard others say the same. I felt totally at ease with him and we just slipped into a relationship with no dramas or big yahoo or anything smile

BendydickCuminsnatch Tue 06-Sep-16 08:45:10

It was a feeling of 'oh, there you are!' smile

ACubed Tue 06-Sep-16 08:45:15

I wound up with someone I'd been friends with for years - I had always been crazy about him but never said anything so as not to ruin the friendship. When the timings finally worked out and found out he felt the same I instantly knew it would work out and last forever (cheesy, sorry!). I had none of the usual anxiety and insecurities I usually have with men, it just seemed really easy and natural. But my best friend always gets to know people first and then falls in love with them!

ArthurFoulkesayce Tue 06-Sep-16 08:45:58

Oh these are lovely :-)

Mum4Fergus Tue 06-Sep-16 09:14:03

I'd been single with DS7 for about a year when I joined what was essentially a hook up site ... I'd no need / want / desire for a relationship. Got chatting to a local guy who I met about a month later.... I knew the minute we started chatting he was 'the one' which considering how/where we met was a bugger lol thankfully he felt the same way (albeit it took a month for us to admit how we felt). Nearly 2 years later he's my absolute best friend and we're in the process of moving in together grin

LoveRosie2008 Tue 06-Sep-16 09:18:23

Yes I did, he had a girlfriend grin.

0dfod Tue 06-Sep-16 09:43:24

From the moment we kissed (6 months of being friends first) I knew he was the one. Everyday I thank the universe for bringing us together. We both feel that our lives started from this point, we have never felt such a strong connection before. It still blows our minds 4.5 years on.

Both of our previous spouse's were abusive, so for us our relationship feels so beautiful and we feel that it is wonderful to experience such love that we share.

ArthurFoulkesayce Tue 06-Sep-16 09:47:46

Odfod, that is just lovely

Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 Tue 06-Sep-16 09:57:25

I met my dh in a bar. Total stranger. Apparently I asked him to swop drinks with me (a pint for a half - bit drunk!) totally not me as am very shy but we kissed at the bar (blush) shared a taxi as we lived in the same village (coincidence or what?) gave him my number and haven't spent a night apart since the next day! 4 years ago now married with a toddler (and already had 10 kids when I met him - divulged in the initial conversation!) Knew the next night stone cold sober that i would always be with him. Sounds cheesy but it just felt like a fact not a romantic notion!

Spaghettidog Tue 06-Sep-16 09:58:17

Honestly, OP, I think the concept of 'the one' is ridiculous - there are potentially lots of 'ones' for everybody, and it's a bit mad (as well as fairly impractical) to think that there's only one person in the universe to complete you, and the chances of that person being unattached and doing OLD/attending a mutual friend's dinner party/joining the same running club in the Walthamstow area are very slim!

I met my now DH aged 19 and we're together very happily in our 40s, and he's certainly 'the one' for me, but I have definitely met at least one, possibly two, other men who would also have been 'the one' (and for whom I would have been 'the one' had we both been unattached and looking for a relationship at the time. We weren't, so have remained friends in the case of one of them.

A lot of my friends have fallen in love with men who'd been around in the background for a while, and whom they hadn't initially considered as romantic partners, but are very happy and I have one friend who had an arranged marriage and fell deeply in love with her husband afterwards.

Don't restrict yourself because of an overly romantic idea that there is Only One Man For You And You Will Know Him As Soon As You Set Eyes On Him, is all I'm saying.

0dfod Tue 06-Sep-16 10:18:54

Arthur my best friend, sister, parents and grandparents as well as two of my aunties have met what they term as their soul mates. I am a firm believer! I just never thought that it would happen to me shock

Grandparents, grandfather told his friend'you see that woman over there? I am going to marry her', his friend replied 'you don't stand a chance, her mother (mayoress) would never allow it' but she did and within a year they were very happily married. Died within 6 weeks of each other.

My parents met and my mum proposed to my dad a year later and they married. They are still madly in love 45 years on.

Aunty A's husband had a news paper clip of my Aunt for 20 years before they met at their children's school gate (both divorced). He never knew who she was until that point but had the photo of her as she touched his soul and he thought her the most beautiful person he had ever seen. They are happily married and believe it was their fate. Ditto Aunt S, my sister and my oldest best friend, all met their husbands and knew straight away.

And so on, so yes I do believe in the one.

Don't give up Op, there is a person for you out there, one whom will make your heart sing.

Bountybarsyuk Tue 06-Sep-16 10:43:40

No, I didn't know straight away. I knew my husband was very attractive and interesting when I first met him, and there was a definite sparkle between us and I fell in love relatively quickly, but I didn't sit there thinking 'he's the one' from day one. I firmly believe that people show their true colours over time, in their interactions with their families, friends, work related stress and so forth, and as I got to know him more over time, I was more impressed. I also had doubts, had doubts when I married (about some aspects of his personality) and still have them, though are happily married! He is My One but that emerged over time rather than being visible the day we met.

TheNaze73 Tue 06-Sep-16 11:16:48

I agree with Spaghetti

I think there can be different "the ones" throughout our lives too.

It's a nice sentiment however, with a potential pool of 3 billion to fish in, on the assumption you're not bi, to think only one person would be compatible seems odd

pasic Tue 06-Sep-16 11:33:45

Mybeardeddragon Not spent a night apart since you met? With 10 kids?

Bloody hell, he was keen.

maggiethemagpie Tue 06-Sep-16 11:36:06

Not on the first date but by the end of date 2 (a long/dirty weekend as DH lived in another city!) we knew.

We met someone in a pub who, on finding out we had just got together and were in a LDR thought they'd embarrass us by asking who'd move city to be with the other. Instead of an awkward silence, DH said he would. And instead of feeling uncomfortable, I felt delighted!

Puddleduckthe2nd Tue 06-Sep-16 11:43:14

we met through OLD, first date we clicked, and saw each other pretty much daily after, he says he knew really quickly that it was something different than normal dating (he actually only went online for a shag as he didn't want a relationship) but within 4 weeks knew we'd get married. I never had the one moment, but after about 6 months, I did think to myself, this is the person I'll end up marrying. Everything was easy and fun and just right. We've been together 5 years, married and kids but there was never a thunderbolt moment. It was a slow burner.

FunkyChunk Tue 06-Sep-16 12:26:18

DFiance and I were friends for a couple of years before getting together. I'd always liked him a lot but we were with other people.
About 3-4 weeks after we started dating, I was walking along the street and just thought to myself "I'm going to marry him one day". I was right! smile

ImYourMama Tue 06-Sep-16 12:28:44

After our first date I got home and said I think I'm going to marry him. And I did. He's my soulmate, and we agree on everything or discuss until we come to an agreement. I can't genuinely imagine life without him, which makes me incredibly vulnerable because I'd be buggered if he was ever run over or similar

Arfarfanarf Tue 06-Sep-16 12:29:16

I married him three months after I met him and we jacked in our jobs and I gave notice on my flat and we moved to a place we'd picked by closing our eyes and pointing at a map and we went there and found jobs and lived there for 8 years. Then moved again.
he is from kenya and only planned to be here a couple of years. He didn't go home for over 12 years and he's only been back 3 times in total and we've been married 18 years.
You make choices that seem like the best ones, that's all anyone can do.

I look back now and I think we were fucking nuts, tbh. grin

ArthurFoulkesayce Tue 06-Sep-16 15:06:13

Some lovely stories here

LoveRosie2008 Tue 06-Sep-16 16:26:39

I think most think they have found 'the one' until they find him/her with their pants down and then we all know from the other threads what happens then? It's true though isn't it?

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