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Life after divorce ...feel like I have been hit by a bus, is this normal?

(6 Posts)
Donatello68 Tue 30-Aug-16 20:43:24

After years of domestic abuse, I started divorce proceedings last Feb. My ExH refused to move out of the family house and made mine & 2 DC's life hell. In July, we finally sold the family home and moved into 2 separate houses. He was a nightmare, wouldn't let me have any furniture etc and was a complete arse. Now a month on, I feel really relieved and like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders. I am self employed and took the summer off to deal with everything. However, I am emotionally and mentally exhausted. I thought that I had done it but, it feels like I still have a long way to go. Is this normal and if so, how long will it last?

Cary2012 Tue 30-Aug-16 21:13:38

Perfectly normal and well done. You've been through so much, been on 'red alert' mentally, never switched off. And now your mind and body is demanding some tlc.

And it takes as long as it takes, we're all different. For me, about 6 months before I really felt 'better'.

Well done, rest if you can, unwind when you can x

Donatello68 Wed 31-Aug-16 00:20:12

Thank you Cary. At least now I know that there is light at end of the tunnel.

Planetmuff Wed 31-Aug-16 05:35:33

It took me 18 months to feel better, much longer than I expected. I 'lost' a year where I was grieving, confused and depressed.
It's individual to each set of circumstances. I hope you feel better soon.

mrsbrightside3 Wed 31-Aug-16 12:17:40

I have read somewhere that it can take 2 years on average to get over a divorce. From experience it was about 18 months / 2 years for me (and I instigated it) my exh says the same. My mum says it took her about 6 weeks when she divorced my dad smile but nearly 10 years when she split from my step dad.

My new husband took about 9 months to a year to adjust he said. His ex wife still hasn't let go..... 3 years and counting...

Give yourself time and be kind to yourself. All life changes take time.

Donatello68 Thu 01-Sep-16 18:14:52

Thanks all. It is good to know that feeling this way is normal. It was certainly unexpected.

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