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Long lost families

(15 Posts)
whataloadofrubbish Thu 25-Aug-16 01:34:06

NC for this.
Last year my dad died who hadn't been part of my life for years. He wasn't a good person at all and I didn't want to be involved. Anyway Long lost families was on tv and dh was tearful so I began to talk to him about how I felt. all of a sudden he got up off the sofa and smacked me on the head and went to a hotel for the night. He previously had mh issues but good god why would anyone do that?
So I began to detach with a view to leaving this summer.
For some reason tonight I was sitting with him with same programme on that he enjoys watching. So I asked him calmly if he was sorry for what he'd done.
First reaction was a flash of anger which he then quashed and then a list of reasons why in his defence eg, your dad was a bastard and you argued with me the day before rubbish.
I walked out of the room and he followed me shouting all the things he thought I had done wrong and then ran off to bed as if he were a victim.
I have calmly said I want a divorce.
The man is a mealy mouthed coward or a raving lunatic. FFS.
Just ranting. What do you think is going on here?

Cavogirl Thu 25-Aug-16 01:36:11

You are right.
Man is a lunatic.
I'm so sorry you are in this situation. Get yourself out quickly And safely OP Xflowers

whataloadofrubbish Thu 25-Aug-16 01:42:19

I know. In the past I would have got upset which he would then stonewall me. For some reason I'm not as bothered.
This is emotional abuse isn't it.

EttaJ Thu 25-Aug-16 01:44:38

Don't even try to understand him. Leave and never look back. Sorry OP 💐

Cavogirl Thu 25-Aug-16 01:44:54

It really sounds like it OP.
I hope you know there is a happy life waiting for you . Please get out as quickly as you can, these things can escalate so fast xx

Canyouforgiveher Thu 25-Aug-16 01:50:09

all of a sudden he got up off the sofa and smacked me on the head

This is really the only bit that matters in your post.

he hit you. That's it. Move on to a better life.

Apart from the fact that he hit you, you don't sound like you like him very much. In fact you sound like you really really dislike him (I don't blame him). Why on earth would you stay with him?

Canyouforgiveher Thu 25-Aug-16 01:50:31

I don't blame YOU

whataloadofrubbish Thu 25-Aug-16 01:53:05

Thanks Cavogirl for the lovely post. Just that this can be so confusing as he must see me asking for any support as a threat. Do some men actually think like this? Frightening.
Also he asked me if I wanted anything from the shop and I said chocolate then he said no it will melt so I said sweets then.
He got back and had clearly forgotten so I commented on this and he began shouting that he had decided I didn't need them yet and was going to get them later.
Trivial I know but makes me feel really paranoid wondering if hes doing weird stuff on purpose. Fanny by gaslight.

whataloadofrubbish Thu 25-Aug-16 01:55:35

Maybe my dislike is showing through. Who wants to have to detach because of this abuse? That's what he's mad at I suppose.

Cavogirl Thu 25-Aug-16 01:56:15

All sounds really disturbing. Keep strong. X

Pineapplechunkster Thu 25-Aug-16 02:02:52

Youre husband is mental! And you've only just found out by watching long lost families? Well sorry i don't know what to tell you other than leave him!!! ASAP!!

Pineapplechunkster Thu 25-Aug-16 02:03:50


whataloadofrubbish Thu 25-Aug-16 02:11:16

No it hasn't been the first sign as he has had mh issues. What a waste of time its been. an emotional rollercoaster.
I actually cried and asked for support last week and he said I was attacking him and locked the door of the room for a couple of minutes.

Pineapplechunkster Thu 25-Aug-16 03:56:34

And you're still there? I'd have left sharpish.

whataloadofrubbish Thu 25-Aug-16 05:18:16

Read back my posts and indeed sounds like a horror film. Better get on with it.

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