Sorry it's a long one but I desperately need some advice.
What was it that finally made you end it? And how did your husband react?
Have been in a very very unhappy marriage for years now. We have been together for 10 years, one dc and I am pregnant.
Previously split up with him and he was threatening suicide and smashing up the house. In the end he was arrested but back the following day. I ended up staying as I had nowhere to go. We spoke that night and he got so much better for a couple of months, I thought things had finally changed. Then I got pregnant.
Since then everything has been slowly slipping back to how it was before, but worse.
I can't take being miserable any more. But I don't know why I'm so terrified of ending things.
I know I need a better plan than last time, I had nowhere to go. I am calling estate agents to book viewing of some houses hopefully in the next week. I have told a select few family members who have said they will help me out with a deposit.
Am hoping I can arrange a place to go, tell him, then leave and give him time to digest it.
I have no idea how I will go on from there as I am a sahm and carer for a family member. As I am named on a mortgage I don't think I'd be entitled to housing benefit and couldn't afford rent. I also have no idea how I will furnish a house but I am sure that will get sorted. I know I have a travel cot I could use until I could arrange to collect dc bed.
I also hate the fact that I feel I am kicking him out of the house as i know he wouldn't afford it on his own (and would destroy it). And I'm worried about him coping on his own.
I am not innocent in everything, I can be very difficult to live with, but I feel we both can be happier apart.
Some days things are ok, and I feel even worse for what I'm planning, but I feel I am loosing myself and am turning into a depressed wreck of a person.
I have previously spoke to WA, they said I needed a one to one advisor but were sending me round in circles trying to get one. I also feel wrong for using them as he hasn't hit me, and I'm bad to him too. I'm always moody with him, as stupid as it sounds it's kind of in the hope that it softens the blow for him when we do split up.
Has anyone experienced this before?
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8 replies
duckyisback · 24/08/2016 11:03
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