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Relationships

Only person that isn't invited is me ...

286 replies

user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 19:09

Me and my best friend have been friends for 14 years.
About 6 years she introduced me to a friend of hers from work and since then me and about 7 other girls have gone on nights out and concerts etc.
One of the girls (we will call her lucy ) is getting married.
My friend invited me on the hen night and we went away for two nights.
I bought her a present and paid towards her hotel and travel etc.
It's the wedding Sunday and I haven't been invited..now I expected not to be invited to the ceremony but I thought she would of invited me to the reception.
I'm the only one not going.
My friend keeps telling me how excited she is and how the girls are all staying in a hotel.
I feel stupid for even going on the hen night (only one from the hen night not going)
The reception everyone has to pay for their own drinks anyway so it's not like they would have to pay for meal or anything.
I just think it's a bit mean I guess and I feel like they must not even like me.
Am I being stupid?

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Aussiebean · 22/08/2016 19:12

Hang on... You are invited to the hens but not the wedding?

And the bride keeps going on at you about how excited she is about the wedding?

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BG2015 · 22/08/2016 19:13

I've been on hen nights and not been invited to the wedding! It all boils down to cost I suppose.

Weddings are expensive! Don't take it personally

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legotits · 22/08/2016 19:13

No you aren't being stupid.

Bride likely is busy and didn't notice but your pals should mention it or plus1 you.

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 19:14

No it was my friend who keeps saying she's excited.
The reception is only in a pub so all drinks would be bought by me.
No buffet or anything just a disco.

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 19:15

One of the girls messages me asking what I was wearing and I had to say I'm not invited and she asked why and I didn't know what to say ..

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whirlwinds · 22/08/2016 19:17

Does your friend know you haven't been invited?

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toopeoply · 22/08/2016 19:17

Could it be a mistake? How were the others invited?

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dArtagnansCrumpet · 22/08/2016 19:17

I would be very hurt if I were you OP and how inconsiderate is your 'friend' going on about it?

How much did you put towards the hen? I don't know what would piss me off more

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legotits · 22/08/2016 19:17

Don't take it to heart.

Either front it out...
'Oi Bridey have you forgot my invite? It'll be shit without me'

Or bluntly tell pal you are boring me now and change subject.
Don't torture yourself with it.

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 19:20

Yeah my friend knows I haven't ..she said a few weeks ago "she probably wouldn't mind if you tagged along" but I'm not 100% ..

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Sparrowlegs248 · 22/08/2016 19:20

Could one of the group ask for you? Surely you should have been invited? There's no way I'd invite someone to a hen do, and not the wedding

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 19:20

Probably about £45 towards it plus a present.
I feel like I probably wasn't even wanted on the hen night as it was my friend who invited me.

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 19:21

No I wouldn't ask them to..she's knew all of them years and I kind of feel like the odd one out.
I won't be bothering going out with them again tbh

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FoxesSitOnBoxes · 22/08/2016 19:31

this group of women have known each other longer than they've known you and are probably, with the exception of your friend, closer to each other than to you. I can't see that she's done anything wrong really but it's shitty when you feel left out Flowers

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dArtagnansCrumpet · 22/08/2016 19:33

£45 plus present! Mental!

I definitely wouldn't bother in the future. I would be more upset at said friend going on about it.

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PushingThru · 22/08/2016 20:43

This sounds like an oversight to me - but I can see why you'd be embarrassed to bring it up.

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pocketsaviour · 22/08/2016 21:18

Woah hold on a sec. So the bride didn't invite you on the hen, your mutual friend invited you?!

You're not invited. Live with it. Who gives a fuck anyway, weddings without at least three deaths are a dull affair.

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LuluJakey1 · 22/08/2016 21:30

Doesn't sound like you are missing much. And your 'friend' doesn't sound very nice really either. I hate weddings because they always cause upset and someone ends up hurt and other people get funny about it. Waste of money as well.

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LuluJakey1 · 22/08/2016 21:30

And they are usually boring.

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RedMapleLeaf · 22/08/2016 21:33

You went on a hen do but weren't invited?

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 22:16

My friend was organising it and I was added to the group chat along with loads of other people.
I kind of felt a bit awkward going if I'm honest as I knew I was invited to wedding

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user1471888857 · 22/08/2016 22:17

Yeah the bride didn't invite me,my friend did (who was organising it) invited me

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RedMapleLeaf · 22/08/2016 22:45

So it does make sense that the couple would be unlikely to invite you to their wedding as it doesn't appear that you're one of their friends. I think in this case your mutual friend has acted little oddly.

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rollonthesummer · 22/08/2016 22:49

Ah-that makes more sense. Your friend has invited you to the hen night, not the bride. That was probably rather inappropriate of her.

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Cabrinha · 22/08/2016 22:57

I actually think it's a bit odd that you thought you'd be invited.

I would hope that your friend actually asked the bride before inviting you on her hen night!

You're not that close to the bride, so you're not invited to the wedding - that's fair enough.

You're just being silly saying you're not going out with them again - cutting off your nose to spite your face.

It doesn't matter whether you would add cost or not - they still would have planned numbers and mix of people they know.

Just let it go.

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