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Will he look for another affair?

(10 Posts)
ThorneyQ Sat 20-Aug-16 16:26:59

Do you think that a man is likely to try to have another affair if he's had an affair that OW ended and he didn't want it to end (he actively sought out the first affair online)? He has no remorse about cheating on his dw (not a particularly happy marriage).

I'm someone a male friend has confided in who probably shouldn't have. Not comfortable with what he did as I vaguely know his dw. Not going to discuss it anymore with him now so just wondering what he's likely to do.

PJBanana Sat 20-Aug-16 16:36:52

I think the obvious answer is yes.

He needs to get out of his marriage, but I doubt he will. He'll just keep on finding OW to cheat with.

TheBriarAndTheRose Sat 20-Aug-16 16:39:14

I think there is a huge difference between someone who has an affair because they have met someone and fallen in love and didn't expect to, and someone who was actively seeking an affair.

I think in the case of the latter, I would be hugely surprised if they didn't seek out another affair.

SandyY2K Sat 20-Aug-16 16:42:01

Yes he will - and here are the words of a man who did just that when his OW dumped him.

The first thing I did when I realized I got ghosted was to check my "affair" email account, to look for a hoom up......... I had an email in there from an old AP saying she wanted me to do a threesome with her and her new boyfriend. It was an old email, I replied and she responded immediately. I was so depressed I said yes to it.

FreeFromHarm Sat 20-Aug-16 16:42:30

Yes he will and then he will cheat on the next and the next... and you will find it wasn't a happy marriage because of his continuous cheating and being unfaithful .. and I am speaking from experience , my xh searches online/ old and normally goes after ow who have property , seems to be all the rage at the moment

Hockeydude Sat 20-Aug-16 16:45:25

Yes because he actively sought out the first affair. I think it's more usual for people to end up sharing colleagues/similar as their affair partner. Seeking an affair seems so much worse.

ThorneyQ Sat 20-Aug-16 17:18:08

Uugghh, that's awful to think that he might but I guess if he thinks he's got away with one he'll try another.
I think I'm out of any further discussions now anyway.
If he is going to carry on it's very very unfair on his dw (I only see her on occasions) who actually seems really nice.
He comes across as the ideal man (obviously not).

clashofclanswidow Sat 20-Aug-16 18:33:29

I think so...

When I got with my ex, he told me his previous relationship was already over. Found out quite a bit later it wasn't but he did end it within days of us starting. I felt horrible over this and still do. Should have left him when I found out but we were together for 6 years (Not that it justifies it before I'm flamed, I just mean we weren't a "fling")

Then he did the same to me...left me and was with a colleague within days. It didn't last long, couple of months and (stupidly now) we got back together but I do have two beautiful girls out if it now.

But he left me for the second time...whilst I was he could get with someone else. You end up seeing a pattern emerging...fool me once...

IrianOfW Sat 20-Aug-16 18:49:35

Yes, for all the reasons stated here. The affair sounds like an arrangement that suited him and now it's over he'll want to find another - a bit like finding a new window cleaner when the old one quits!

Of course if his wife knew he might be forced to face some consequences and a few cold hard truths.

LittleOyster Mon 22-Aug-16 15:19:47

Yes, I think it's very likely that he'll be seeking out another OW before long. I know a man who does this. He's had 3 or 4 mistresses in 8 years of marriage, all of whom he met online. The Internet enables this kind of 'shopping' for extra-marital sex.

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