I'm not sure if this is the right place however I need some advice about my DM. She has always been the type to NEED a man around, my DF was a waste of space who cheated and landed himself in prison more than he was out of it, however she dutifully stuck with him and took us along for visits. Fun. This was until he met someone else and left her, after he went she was in a kind of a, must find man frenzy. It was always a treat to wake up and see a different man there for breakfast in the morning.
This carried on for years until she met my stepfather, he was 19 she was 34. He was ok, he made her happy and he genuinely cared for myself and my brothers they were together for 20 years.
Just about a year ago they split up, they were fighting a lot and my SF got into drugs, however just like with my DF she stayed and stayed until he was the one that left.
So now she's on her own and it's starting again, she was going out every night (fair enough her business) meeting strangers on the internet and sleeping with them on the first night only for her to wonder why she never hears from them again.
More recently she was contacted by a man from turkey, one of those you are so beautiful please be my friend requests on Facebook. He wiggled his way in and now DM is "in Love". It's like reading a Daily Mail article and she wont listen to me.
He is a walking red flag, his facebook profile had no friends except for DM, he barely speaks English and he is apparently possessive and controlling her already, for example I went to visit with my children and he told her to make us leave. She actually made us go. He has been putting pressure on her to go to Turkey, she has now booked a two week ticket for September. (she will be staying with him) and she has never been abroad before. I am so bloody worried for her, she doesn't find it odd that he's mentioning visa's and marriage in the same sentence.
She has no money though and hasn't worked in years, she honestly believes that she is going to walk into a job paying enough for him to live here. I am at my wits end and my brother is pulling his hair out.
In the interests of not drip feeding I met my now husband online 7 years ago, he is Dutch and moved here to be with me, we are now married and have children and she wants the same. Thank you for ploughing through this and I know it reads like an episode of Jeremy Kyle but it is all sadly true.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Middle aged mother and the Turkish boyfriend
KraggleLego · 16/08/2016 12:39
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