Having been single for a long time, I entered into a FWB relationship a few months ago. The Sex has been great and I've enjoyed having male company again after such a long time.
I thought it was working well- we're both busy with young kids and weren't looking for anything more serious. He has told me he's not seeing anyone else- I believe him as he works incredibly long hours and has his kids 50% of the time. He's also said I'm free to date other people and I have been doing online dating though without any joy.
Initially we were seeing each other once a week/every 10 days, sometimes just for sex and sometimes for a meal or a gig first. This has dwindled to once every 3 weeks. He has also stopped sexting or even flirting by text. However, this is where the confusion has arisen ( and am guessing that FWB arrangements attract confusion). He still texts daily - sometimes 2 or 3 times- but just a run down of his day or asking about mine, offering support and advice. I just went on holiday and he asked me to text whilst I was away and texted me to see if I was back home safely. I feel like we've drifted into the equivalent of old married couple pen pals! I thought in FWB the emphasis is on the benefits. Especially as in our case we weren't friends to start with and haven't spent enough time together to really form a friendship. I would rather swap the daily texts for flirty ones arranging to meet up or sexting when that wasn't possible.
We had planned to spend a day together this week as its been a long time since we've seen each other but he has other plans ( disappointing but fine- we're not in a relationship). He has however suggested another time this week- but for an hour only which he thinks is plenty of time to have a cup of tea and a catch up and get down to business! I do feel a bit disappointed by this ( in the sense of I'd hoped for a lengthy sex session, really exploring our fantasies etc) and a bit nonplussed ( can I really be bothered with a quickie? The last few times have been so brief and so spaced apart that I haven't really found myself able to let go and have the mind blowing connection we had at the start).
So my query is- as its a FWB arrangement do I even have the right to bring up my frustrations? Should I expect more benefits or is that veering into relationship territory? I'm rather sleep deprived at the moment so inclined to think 'oh f&&k it. I can't be bothered' but on the other hand, he has rearranged things in order to see me and I'm sure the sex will be fine ( and am somewhat reluctant to go back to the long drought!).
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Relationships
FWB- without much benefits?
Clawdeen · 16/08/2016 10:12
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