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First proper date!

(4 Posts)
pimmsy Sat 06-Aug-16 12:12:32


This is my first proper post here, I have been lurking for a couple of months since I split with my partner of 7 years ( Also, english is not my mother tongue, so please excuse any weird use of language) .

So here goes....
I split at the beginning of June with my female partner of just under 7 years, no children although we had started the process which is complicated here due to legislation.

I am 27 and although I had had a couple of fumbles with boys whilst I was in my teens, I have never dated a man.

Last week at a conference a male colleague from a another branch of my institution asked me if I would like to go to a concert with him. I had met him on a few other work related occasions and we had got on well, I think he may even have been flirting now I think about it, but I also know I am quite blind to heterosexual rites. When he asked I said yes, because I am interested in him and genuinely found him to be a nice guy.

The concert is this evening, I am half excited, half scared shitless. I have no expectations of what a date should consist of, or what is expected as normally dating etiquette.

We are going to a classical concert and he has made reservations in a restaurant afterwards.

I have no idea if it is a possibility that he asks about my dating history, and if he did, should I mention I was only in a couple with a woman before? I have debated trying to stay gender neutral, but the language here would make that very complicated.

Does any one have any tips or general suggestions for me?


pimmsy Sat 06-Aug-16 14:09:50

No one ?

I feel like an anthropologist with no primary sources, suddenly thrown into the field.

BubblingUp Sat 06-Aug-16 16:54:38

Don't disclose too much on the 1st date on any subject. Ask questions of him, let him do the talking. You may discover he is not someone you are interested in after he tells you about himself. The discovery process is gradual, let him go first.

I read a quote once about meetings - meetings of any type - work, dates, whatever - don't bring the whole cathedral to the meeting, just bring a brick.

pimmsy Sat 06-Aug-16 17:18:54

Thnakyou BubblingUp,

I will take abord your advice! Just a brick. I suppose I'm also scared because I've never really dated, I met my ex at 20 at a party and within 3 weeks we were living together .... So it's all new to me, regardless of gender, I suppose.
I will see how it goes!

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