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How do you take the plunge?

(4 Posts)
smileyhappypeople Thu 21-Jul-16 20:44:20

How do you take the plunge and leave a relationship and move on??

I absolutely adore my husband, we have been together for 13 years since I was 17, we have 3 dc. In my heart I want to grow old together and be a happy family and everything be rosy but in reality we are falling apart.
We have grown apart and it's becoming obvious We want different things.... I think I have grown up and matured and he just hasn't.
I have been working my arse off to save a deposit for a house and to make a better and more stable life for our children. There is a financial situation he needs to deal with and if he doesn't it will likely cost us the mortgage... It's been going on for 2 years! Only he can deal with it and he's just refusing, it's always I'll call tomorrow I promise etc etc or he sulks and tells me to stop nagging.
There's other stuff too but this is the biggy, he just doesn't seem to get that this is our whole future on the line!he has also started being awful to the kids, he's always been strict but the kids still absolutely think the world of him but lately it seems like every time they speak or make a noise or do something wrong then he just flips! (He is clearly struggling with the death of his parents but he won't get help)
In my head I want to just leave, I have a feeling we will be happier (although I'm not 100% convinced) but in my heart I want our perfect family and this man that I love with all my heart who has been my whole world for all of my adult life!
I have no family or friends support so would be just me and the kids.
Someone please tell me wwyd? And how?

FreeFromHarm Thu 21-Jul-16 20:50:36

Sorry that you are going through this, when you say 'flip' how bad is that.....

smileyhappypeople Thu 21-Jul-16 21:03:52

Just shouts etc he's not violent or anything. It's just like he doesn't even like them so they irritate him instantly!
Most of the time he's a brilliant dad and they love him dearly... Maybe I shouldnt have put that but in, don't want the post to turn to being all about his parenting...
I do worry that they will grow up to dislike him or to think they had an unhappy childhood because daddy was just grumpy all the time

FreeFromHarm Thu 21-Jul-16 21:20:04

ok, so you have to walk on eggshells all the time, that is not a life... Was it long ago he lost his parents ?, do you think possibly...or have you any other concerns maybe ?

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