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Changing my name

(45 Posts)
startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 14:12:24

I have just heard from my children that XH has proposed to the OW and they plan to get married next year! Whilst I am largely unbothered by this, I have now reached a stage where she has my pity and is welcome to him (apologies if that sounds bitter! It's probably because I am ) However I always said if they married and she became Mrs **face , then I no longer wanted to be Mrs **face and would revert to my maiden name. How many of you have done that? How difficult is it and does it complicate issues with passports etc. I have a holiday booked as Mrs **face so would need to travel on my 'married name ' passport. Is it allowed to be known under two names until it's all sorted and changed over? Is there a time scale that I must change my name on everything? Any advice will be much appreciated!

PurpleWithRed Wed 13-Jul-16 14:19:34

I did it. It's doable but I found it helpful to get a deed poll with multiple certified copies - it's not legally necessary but for a small outlay it meant I had a legal document to send out. (Google deed polls - scarily cheap and easy to get). Companies seemed happy to send them back to me after changing my details. I kept one in my handbag for ages, surprisingly handy.

hellsbellsmelons Wed 13-Jul-16 14:20:07

No time scale as such.
I recently changed my name.
It took me 5 years!!
I was known as 'single-barrelled' to all intents and purposes but you do have to prove who you are.
So if you are changing your name back to your maiden name you will need the original copy of your marriage certificate for updating your passport and your driving license and your bank accounts and your pensions.
I think that's all. Luckily I kept my maiden and just added my ExH name on the end so a lot of places were OK with it.
You need to let A LOT of people know though.
So do a list.
Council etc...

Backintheday2016 Wed 13-Jul-16 14:20:55

I reverted back to my name straight away and the dc kept his name. No problems there at all.

You can use either/both names. I use my original name for nearly everything but some agencies are funny about changing it just on your sayso. When I changed my name at my bank they wanted the original decree absolute and my birth certificate. If you want to do everything officially you can change your name by deed poll although I have never bothered. I would have thought you could travel on your passport with your married name. You can be known as any name you choose so it's easy go back to your maiden name if you wish.

I felt I didn't want to have the same name as his family and my mil!

AnotherEmma Wed 13-Jul-16 14:21:24

Yes you can change your name on everything except your passport. I don't think you need a deed poll, you will probably just need to provide your divorce certificate. Change your name on your bank accounts, driving licence, etc etc, and then just change it on your passport when it expires.

startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 14:28:39

Hells bells ....I don't have the original copy of my marriage certificate, that went to the divorce courts and was never returned......

Happyinthehills Wed 13-Jul-16 14:29:09

When I left H1 the same solicitor that dealt with the divorce did a Declaration Intent to revert to my maiden name. It was accepted everywhere no problem. Only cost about £100.

AnthonyPandy Wed 13-Jul-16 14:34:06

Changing your name is free.

Just google 'Free deed poll'.

Please please do not pay a penny for this.

hellsbellsmelons Wed 13-Jul-16 14:40:13

And as long as your booking name for your holiday matches your passport you will be just fine!

PsychedelicSheep Wed 13-Jul-16 14:40:36

I changed my name by deed poll. Took a couple of weeks max and cost about £20 or so I think 😊

hellsbellsmelons Wed 13-Jul-16 14:43:19

Yes I had the same problem.
You can write to the local council where you got married for an original 'copy'
The cost was £11.
Although the church I got married in don't do many marriages and hadn't submitted any updates to council since 1977!
So I had to call the church and get them to do another one for me and go and collect it.
I just made a £20 donation to the church for that!
It was fun fun fun confused

hellsbellsmelons Wed 13-Jul-16 14:45:04

I had a long chat with passport people and they know you don't get your marriage cert back after divorce.
They don't care - they want an original and you have to get one.

fuckyoudoorhandles Wed 13-Jul-16 14:52:22

I changed mine by deed poll too, very cheap and simple but remember to get a few certified copies as you don't always get them back.
The marriage certificate was used in the divorce and I never saw it after that.
Deed poll is by far the simplest option.

bestyearsofmylife Wed 13-Jul-16 15:00:37

What anthonypandy says. I recently got divorced for the second time and wanted to revert to my previous married name and not my maiden name. I googled 'free deed poll', filled out the form and printed 3 copies. Got my witnesses to sign all 3 copies so that I had 3 originals, in case one got lost.

DVLA changed all my documents for free, bank did the same, and I am still in the process of notifying people. I changed my name on my insurance when it was due for renewal so that I did not incur an admin fee.

The only thing I am still using my married name on is my passport as they charge the full renewal fee. I will change this when my current passport expires. Just make sure if you book any foreign holidays that you book in the same name as your passport as ticket name must be the same.

startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 15:15:42

I've just spoken to the passport office and they're saying I can't keep my passport on my married name if I've reverted back to my maiden name? I only have 18 months to run on my passport but they'll only carry over 9 months ..... It seems from replies on here that I can go ahead and change my name but just make sure I book holiday and travel on my married name? Has anyone done this and managed to travel securely without problems? Don't want to mess up my holiday in September! Incidentally hells bells, the passport office said I don't need my marriage certificate just my decree absolute!

startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 15:16:51

Best years of my life. Have you kept your car insurance in your married name then?

AnotherEmma Wed 13-Jul-16 15:17:25

I think it's a bit weird that the passport office told you that... when I changed my name I did it on everything except my passport (because I still had about 18 months left before it expired, same as you). You will be able to travel as long as the name on your passport and ticket is the same.

pinkyredrose Wed 13-Jul-16 15:52:58

You've already changed your name once, surely you know what's involved? confused

startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 16:43:04

pinky the last time I changed my name was 26 years ago! I've
a) forgotten what I did.
b) had far less things in my name
c) didn't even have passport, mortgage, telephone or credit cards when I got married!
A lot has changed in 26 years!
I was just a little unsure of the process and time scale!

HeadDreamer Wed 13-Jul-16 16:52:06

I'm sure you are fine travelling in your old name, as long as the passport matches the plane ticket. How would they know, honestly?

I remember receiving something similar when I got married. About needing to change my name on my passports etc. I just throw out that piece of paper and ignored it. I was in my 30s and I can't be bothered changing my name on everything.

I changed DDs names (adding another middle name from my culture). It's so much easier for young children. Both have passports still in their old names. And I only have to notify the GP. So I totally understand your point about it being easier when you are younger and have less things.

hellsbellsmelons Wed 13-Jul-16 17:09:06

Flippin heck.
The trouble I went to as well.
They sent my forms back insisting on marriage cert.

Fourormore Wed 13-Jul-16 17:20:51

I travelled for 8 years on my passport in my married name even though I had changed my name on everything else. I just had to make sure all my flights and hotels were booked in my married name.

You definitely don't need to pay - as a PP said, Google free deed poll. Mine was witnessed by my then boyfriend, on crappy printer paper and had been rolling around the bottom of my handbag for 8 years until I sent it to the passport office, so was suitably worn, stained and torn. They updated it no problems.

startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 18:33:38

Thanks four everyone I've asked seems to think it's ok to keep my passport until it expires ! Having made the decision I feel quite empowered now! In control and it feels good 😀

startingover231 Wed 13-Jul-16 18:40:26

Thanks too anthonypandy for your advice re free deed poll, it never occurred to me I could do it for free!

AnthonyPandy Wed 13-Jul-16 22:41:19

The only thing I would add about the deed poll is make sure you get enough copies as not everyone returns them. I had 10 done (printed out at the library on bog standard paper) and am now down to three. But once I had changed my name I let everyone know at once, if you are in no rush you could get away with fewer copies probably.

And you do realise that this is your big chance to give yourself a whacky middle name, don't you?!

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