Name changed yadda yadda.
Will try not to drip feed.... Dh was with his ex for 8 years (no kids). I met him via mutual friends about 8 months before they split. Nothing happened between us, not even flirting. We hadn't even spent a single minute alone together, no emotional affair or anything like that. However he said he fell in love with me, but I knew he was in a long term relationship, so I cut contact. I started seeing someone else and months passed with no contact from him. I thought he was infatuated or maybe just had grass is greener syndrome or something.
Couple of months later, I was single again and he found out and got back in touch. He had broken up with his ex by this point. We became friends and then got together quite quickly four months after they split up.
Fast forward six years and we are married with children. His ex has done a lot of spiteful things to both of us, especially during the first three years we were together. Clearing out their joint account, selling his stuff, that sort of thing. She's also best mates with his sister and it's caused endless family drama with dh's sister taking her "side" and inviting her to family occasions instead of us, that sort of thing.
Here's the issue. I always thought she knew we got together when they had already broken up. But I met her for the first time last week (everyone had always went to great lengths to keep us apart, I thought it was because they thought I hated her for the spiteful stuff, not the other way around). And she hates me because she thinks we had been having an affair. All these years. I can't believe no one set her straight, I can only assume I was a subject avoided, like she was when anyone spoke to me.
When we met, I was so nervous, I fumbled over words and I don't think I got my point across. I was so shocked that she was so angry and hated me. Do you think I should just let sleeping dogs lie, or should I contact her again and tell her we didn't cheat. Will it make a difference to her? I've been cheated on before, it affected every relationship since and also, I'm sick of the evil looks and offhand comments I get from her family members. At least now I know why. They think I am/was an ow.
Sorry this is so long. Genuinely just want to know what the best thing to do is.
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Relationships
Should I contact dh's ex to set record straight that I wasn't the OW?
Fuckoffdailymailyoufuckers · 11/07/2016 22:40
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