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AIBU to expect support from my best friend

(4 Posts)
poppygolightly Sun 03-Jul-16 10:49:12

I have supported my best friend through many things over the past few years and always respond to her texts when she complains about her life and relationships. We work in the same office, even though we met before we worked together.
Anyway, my mum had to go to see her hospital consultant on Friday afternoon to get her Mri and blood test results to see if she has cancer. I have been worried all week and mentioned it to my friend several times, including on Friday at lunch. AIBU to be upset and annoyed that she hasn't contacted me all weekend to check I'm ok or ask how my mum is, especially as her cat has recently been poorly and I texted or spoke to her regularly to ask about it?

noblegiraffe Sun 03-Jul-16 10:58:31

Some people aren't very good at that sort of emotional support. You clearly are, but she isn't.
Now you know that, you need to reassign her in your head into what sort of thing she actually is there for, and find another friend who will support you with the emotional stuff.

I hope your mum is ok flowers

poppygolightly Sun 03-Jul-16 11:00:48

Mum now has to wait another week as the Mri is not clear and they need another specialist to look at it. She will also need a biopsy which is quite invasive and requires a hospital stay. sad

noblegiraffe Sun 03-Jul-16 11:13:12

It sounds like a really stressful time and you are spreading yourself quite thin with texting your friend about her ill cat and being annoyed about your friendship. You need your headspace at the moment to care for your mum, so TBH I would drop the ill cat texts and stop trying to support your friend for the next week or so. Focus on your mum, and the rest of the time take care of yourself. If your friend can't support you, is there someone else to talk to about it? If not, MN can often help as there are usually lots of people who have been through the same thing.

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