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Any advice please!!!

(12 Posts)
Tiredmummy90 Sat 02-Jul-16 19:03:44

Hello fellow mummys I'm a 26 year old mum of two a 10 year old girl and a 2 year old boy 2 years ago I split up with my child's father leaving me on my own with my two I don't have any of my own friends as our friends in the past were pretty much his friends.. I met a new partner last yea me but he doesn't work or make me feel special at all he has a child who he is a full time parent of his child constantly bully's by child and he never tells him off no matter what I say we don't live together and when we see eachother the stress of the kids fighting has pushed me to breaking point I feel like I'm just with him as nobody else would want me sad Iv never felt so low in my entire life almost feel like a child at the minute if anyone has been in my Situation please let me know thanks

Chocolatefudgecake100 Sat 02-Jul-16 20:00:17

Get rid and work on self confidence op your low at the moment and need to get strong alone then you WILL meet the right guy and be happy you have a 2 year old why not try a playgroup to meet other mums? U will get there

Tiredmummy90 Sat 02-Jul-16 21:02:31

Iv tried stay and play sessions but nobody's spoke to me I'm quite shy 🙈 And if I get rid I'm getting rid of my only adult conversation I have 😭

Vertigo58 Sat 02-Jul-16 21:34:53

His child is constantly bullying your child...are you the one then stepping in to stop this but getting no support from him or are you just asking him to step in and stop this but he won't and so its continuing? either way its really not on. You're only 26 plenty of time to find someone and more importantly someone who will respect your children as well as their own.

Chocolatefudgecake100 Sat 02-Jul-16 21:37:54

Trust me i know how you feel but you wont be alone forever and you wont find the right guy when staying with the wrong one

BolshierAryaStark Sat 02-Jul-16 21:40:38

Baby groups can be hostile joints unfortunately, try again & talk to people?
I found quite a few good friends when DD started nursery so hope yet.
Deffo ditch the partner, your child is suffering.

MatildaTheCat Sat 02-Jul-16 21:47:36

End this awful relationship and have a chat with your HV who might be able to help you with joining some supportive groups. Life shouldn't be so miserable and can 100% improve. Do you have any support at all?

Tiredmummy90 Sat 02-Jul-16 21:54:17

I should have mentioned before the child is autistic and isn't aware he is doing this it's more like aggressive behaviour in general in no way would I allow my child to be bullied,I don't have any family but I think like a few people have said about meeting new people at playgroups could be a good thing just have to get through the shyness thing I guess.maybe time to focus on me and my own family Thank you for your replys X

Cantgoonanymore Sat 02-Jul-16 22:08:14

Have you heard of a charity called HomeStart?
They can offer a volunteer to visit you and help with stuff...Maybe just a listening ear or going with you to such groups to help you meet people. Your HV should've heard of them and be able to refer you to them or you could refer yourself. They will match you to a volunteer that they think would suit you. You then get to meet the volunteer first and if you both click then you generally meet up once a week for about 3hrs. They visit for a variety of reasons from loneliness to depression to lending an extra pair of hands with twins and everything in-between. The main criteria to receive help is that you have a child under 5yo.


Sunflower30 Sat 02-Jul-16 22:10:44

I agree with everyone else, you don't like him so don't stay with him. It's hard to make new friends when you're a shy person, I'm also very shy and struggle to make new friendships. I would just say, go to every group you can. And go regularly. Don't just go once or twice and give up when you don't instantly hit it off with another mum. Go, just make eye contact and be pleasant with people to begin with and when you start to feel more comfortable try talking to some people you like. Some of the parents that go to those groups will be hoping to meet a friend too.

Lookatyourwatchnow Sat 02-Jul-16 22:13:44

You need to end this relationship, OP. Adult conversation is not a good enough reason to remain in an unhappy relationship. You can find adult conversation in so many other places.

loveyoutothemoon Sat 02-Jul-16 22:26:28

Your lack of confidence is due to being with him. Get rid of him and you'll be surprised how much better your life will feel. And maybe this relationship has prevented you from forming friendships. Try some different playgroups.

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