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How to have a better relationship with myself?

(6 Posts)
WalkingZed Sun 26-Jun-16 20:00:31

I really struggle with feeling that I'm not good enough or not as good as others. I constantly worry about things I've said and if I may have offended someone. I go over and over conversations. I worry about my interactions with people and if, for example, someone doesn't reply to a message I've sent them them I'll think (probably stupidly) it's because they don't like me!

I know I need to value myself more and get higher self esteem but I don't know how.

A gentleman I was in touch with told me the key to unlocking a 'worry free and confident' future lay with him but he was going to charge me £500 for a 6 week course. Just saying this as I have tried to get help with this.

I worry about not being as good as others at my job despite being often told that I'm extremely good.

I'm full of self doubt that I just can't shift.

I worry about not being a good enough mother to my lovely children. I actually had s MC last year and a voice in my head it was because I didn't deserve 3 children.

I just wondered if anyone here has successfully improved their self esteem and how they did it?

Thanks

BlackVelvet1 Sun 26-Jun-16 20:04:28

Yes

BlackVelvet1 Sun 26-Jun-16 20:11:39

Oups, sorry hit post too soon. Part of it was understanding where it came from, in my case from my relationship with my mother. This has also helped be become more assertive with DH. Although it's not perfect, things are better. I also sometimes try to imagine what I would think if it was not me but someone I care about it instead. For example, if I did something well but find myself trying to find errors or minimising, I'll try to imagine how I would think about it if it was DH's achievement.

WalkingZed Sun 26-Jun-16 20:28:37

That's good advice Black I do try to think about what someone else would think or say in x,y,z situation and they probably wouldn't care but I take everything so personally!

redexpat Sun 26-Jun-16 20:31:15

There are a lot of hupnotherapy apps available for free or for a very small cost. Might be worth seeing what you can find in the itunes or play store.

BrandNewAndImproved Sun 26-Jun-16 20:37:36

Counselling. You don't need to go to your gp just type in your area and talking therapy into Google to get a number to ring.

Eat well, early nights, haircut, new clothes, do what you love, exercise. All a cliché but it works. Also find a hobby or interest to keep your mind occupied and to get you socialising more. It's amazing how making friends with people who like you can boost your self esteem.

Having a hobby with achievable goals really will help you op.

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