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Is it always better to be honest?

(8 Posts)
Truthfull Mon 20-Jun-16 17:55:31

I was stewing on something this morning about my relationship, he's become extremely distant after a year of being together.

I brought it up with him, I asked him whether there was another woman in the picture and if he wants different things. He said he is shocked that I would think that low of him, that he's never been dishonest and that he feels like I'm becoming someone who needs to know where he is 24/7 (I'm not).

He hasn't contacted me since, this was just something that I needed to clarify in my head and it now seems as though I was wrong to do this and should have just brushed it under the carpet.

I'm beginning to feel regret asking him so is it always better to be honest? Or should I just bottle things like this up?

Tearsoffrustration Mon 20-Jun-16 17:59:03

How long has he been distant for?

Truthfull Mon 20-Jun-16 18:01:41

A few weeks now, I've made the effort to start conversation and he seems to have backed off a bit.

nicenewdusters Mon 20-Jun-16 18:08:20

Yes, I think always better to be honest about YOUR feelings. You can't guarantee that he'll (or anyone) will always be honest about theirs.

I would understand him being a bit hurt if you suggested he may have met/have feelings for somebody else. But if his behaviour has made you suspect that then you are only being honest. If he wants to put your mind at rest and sort things out ignoring you isn't the way.

Tearsoffrustration Mon 20-Jun-16 18:13:49

Face to face conversation or text?

Tearsoffrustration Mon 20-Jun-16 18:28:05

Cos I think a lot can be lost in text - but if he's being moody face to face & not telling you why then don't wait anymore time on him.

AnecdotalEvidence Mon 20-Jun-16 18:40:37

I'd be pretty pissed off if my DH said to me - you've been a bit distant, is there someone else?

I don't think you should have brushed it under the carpet, but unless you have a tangible reason to think that he is being unfaithful, that's just a horrible thing to say. There could be all kinds of reasons why he's been a bit distant. You didn't show any concern for him at all.

Flurple Mon 20-Jun-16 18:53:08

Was there a reason for you asking if there's someone else? Just wondering about trust here? And was the conversation face to face? That can make a difference. What makes you feel he's become distant?

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