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(10 Posts)
Anon1623 Thu 09-Jun-16 22:46:36

Hi there..... I really just want to sense check myself here.
My ex and I split about 3 months ago and have so far had a relatively amicable relationship regarding the kids 1 and 4. He has been very good coming round to look after the kids and take them to nursery two mornings a week when I start work at 6:30am, and he has them saturdays.
I made a bit of a boo boo last week and forgot to take the pushchair out of my car as I dashed out to work. He of course called me at work to yell at me and tell me how hard I've made his day ( 10 min walk around the corner) . I of course apologised. But.... I forgot again this week. I have said it would be nice if he could just remind me on my way out, but he is still going ballistic, calling me while he's drunk and claiming that I don't care about my children's welfare and safety. Also that it's not his responsibility to make sure the pushchair is there. This of course has made me furious as my kids are my entire world.
I told him he should get a cheap buggy for his van to save the problem if I forget. I work full time in management and I'm not wonder woman unfortunately. Is it just me? Is it too much to ask that he could remind me? I try to remember but I'm juggling a lot at the mo. AIBU?

Gardenbirds123 Thu 09-Jun-16 22:49:19

YABU. It shouldn't be up to him to remind you. You are an adult. You have separated. He's not your PA.

(Although he shouldn't be callingnuoubdrinnk to moan. )grin

TokenGinger Thu 09-Jun-16 22:51:41

You're not being unreasonable. If you're in a rush in a morning, it's very easy to forget something that's in your car. I forget my lunch most days!!

You're right with suggesting he should get s cheap buggy. He's an equal parent. He should have necessities in his home/car as you do.

Anon1623 Thu 09-Jun-16 23:07:26

I realise he's not my pa. I'm not trying to be childish but he's always asking me to remind him of things and I just thought if he hadn't seen it on his way in, he might just mention it not being there......

Cabrinha Thu 09-Jun-16 23:09:47

Nothing excuses him yelling at you.

But you need to sort yourself out to remember the pushchair. Yes, he should just remind you. But - he's got as much "right" as you to forget - and honestly I'd be pissed off if I were him. I'd be polite to you and remind you, but I'd be texting my mate to bitch about you being useless and me not being your flipping mother. I know that's OTT, but splits are rarely that amicable and it would irritate me.

Does the pushchair have to stay in the car? Make a habit of keeping it I the house and this won't happen. Or set a reminder on your smartphone "PUSHCHAIR!!" for those mornings.

If he only uses the pushchair from yours, it's a bit pointless to by a spare when it's easier to just sort out yours being available.

flowers early days of a split are hard, and he sounds like an arsehole with his yelling.

Anon1623 Thu 09-Jun-16 23:15:19

I have only forgotten twice in 6 months since I've been back at work. It's not like I do it everyday. Thanks for the input. I shall set myself an alarm!

Cabrinha Thu 09-Jun-16 23:22:18

But you said you forgot last week and again this week? confused

Like I say, he sounds an arse. I just know what I'd be saying to my friends about my ex if he did it. It would start "fucksake..." smile

HeddaGarbled Thu 09-Jun-16 23:30:30

Sellotape a note to your dashboard.

SandyY2K Thu 09-Jun-16 23:39:15

Carrying a 1 year old for 10 minutes can seem like forever, but you forgot the pushchair and it wasn't deliberate.

There was no need for him to scream and shout like that though.

I think a cheap pushchair would save all the hassle TBH.

Anon1623 Fri 10-Jun-16 00:59:17

Thanks guys.... Looks like ill get him a cheap buggy for the just in cases. And I have set that reminder.....

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