Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

What do you think we could do?

(3 Posts)
DontLookForShootingStars Thu 09-Jun-16 16:43:46

Finally told DH last night that I think we should call time on being married and work at being friends like we used to be, to which he has agreed. We are in a housing association house, he's retired and I'm working but can't get a mortgage so will be sharing space (with DS15) for now. What rules/agreements/plans do you think would help us make this work for the foreseeable future?

Jan45 Thu 09-Jun-16 16:48:27

I would advise not doing this tbh, if it's housing association can you not contact them and let them know what has happened, they might find a place for you and your child?

Sorry but it sounds like a recipe for disaster and that you are doing this because it's easier than actually making changes but I don't see how it can work unless you both agree to never bring a partner into your lives which sounds hardly likely, don't leave it until you do meet someone, sort out your separation properly.

Cabrinha Thu 09-Jun-16 16:51:31

What do you mean by the foreseeable future? Until 6 months to sort out renting somewhere, until your son is 18, or leaves home, or forever?

Priority would be agreeing what to tell your son.

Then rules about finances - if one of you has more income it doesn't matter when you're married, but could lead to resentment if a lower contributing housemate is leaving the lights on, tumble drying in sunny weather, drinking more wine, etc...

Longer term: dating. Is it allowed? Is the other person willing to speak to dates? If I dated your husband, and want your confirmation that it wasn't cock and bull that you were separated!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now