I would really like some advice from other mummies on this.
We have been together 9 years two small children.
Since the birth of both children my sex drive is low. Normal stuff, body different, I had a lot of tearing etc and physical damage after the birth of my first child. Things don't feel the same unfortunately!!!
For years now it's been a problem in our relationship.
The constant pestering with hands all over me during the night, tantrums when I ask him to stop, calling me names, leaving me to sleep on inches of my side if the bed, then watching porn while I'm trying to sleep, the list is endless.
I do occasionally agree, but it's normally after a night out and a few drinks. May only be 2/3 times a year!!!
I lay in tears some nights, he rants off around the house slamming doors then sulks for days on end.
I'm beginning to really hate him.
I've begged and pleaded he stops pestering me and my want for him may come back. I've begged for cuddles and decent nights sleep, but now after years and years of it I'm emotionally exhausted.
Of course he completely blames me for my lack of sex drive, and it's me that needs help. His pestering and moods etc are just a symptom of lack of sex and he will not take blame for it.
In fact I've been to the doctors twice in 4 years (requested by him) and both times they have reassured me it's normal to feel lack of sex drive etc and his behaviour is unacceptable on all levels. My last visit last year told me it's abuse and I should get professional help. Of course I didn't tell him this.
I'm at my wits end with it all. I'm constantly on egg shells and feel really hurt by the accusations he throws at me and how it's all ME!
Please advise, I know I'm not fulfilling him but is this acceptable behaviour for me to lay awake crying, being treated like this, accused of being frigid etc on a daily basis.
I'm at breaking point. X
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Pestering/lack of labido
Cinnamon5 · 08/06/2016 10:08
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