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Relationships

Reporting assault to police using anonymous system

10 replies

SummerIsComing234 · 03/06/2016 20:32

I am looking for advise. I am in an abusive relationship and currently trying to get myself out (have never posted but followed advice given to others).

Part of this is that I want to report some of the abuse, which I am initially planning to report via the anonymous process. I am going to have an appointment to fill the paperwork in for this where I am sure they will explain everything. However I was wondering if anyone could advise me what to expect with this process? Given it goes to the police is there a chance they may press charges/pull person in for questioning based on what was written? (Whether this is yes or no I will still be going ahead with it)

Sorry I know that I haven't given specific details but just trying to prepare myself. Thanks in advance.

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SummerIsComing234 · 03/06/2016 21:22

Anyone??

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FreeFromHarm · 03/06/2016 22:04

Bit confused why you are reporting anonymous, hope you do not mind me asking , are you not together ?

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gottariskitforabiscuit · 03/06/2016 22:05

Hi OP I'm really sorry I honestly have no helpful advice/info for you however I just wanted to bump this up for you & say I'm sorry you're going through this & well done for finding the courage to take steps to reporting it & trying to get yourself out most people who have never been in an abusive relationship have no idea how hard it is to try to get out/escape hopefully someone with some knowledge will be along soon who can give you some advice/info Smile Flowersfor you

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SummerIsComing234 · 03/06/2016 22:15

Anonymous as I want to make sure there is a record in case he ever does this to someone else. But also my focus is on getting out at the moment. Also I have blanked things so much I could not even say what month it happened in let alone what day so think chances of conviction extremely low but will discuss this when I go through the form.

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TheNIghtManagersWife · 03/06/2016 22:19

Are you sure you will still go ahead and report even if the police do take it further?

I reported my husband for assaulting me quite viciously. Like you, I didn't want to press charges but wanted it on record.

The police went over my head and took him in for questioning anyway. I was terrified and begged them not to.

It was the best thing that ever happened and led to me having to tell my family and subsequently leave him. I am so grateful that they intervened and ultimately changed my life by protecting me and my children in the longer term.

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TheNIghtManagersWife · 03/06/2016 22:21

I reported him anonymously I should have said. I did this by going to the station but refusing to give my address or details about him (I can't remember exactly what I withheld).

I don't know if you are doing it in the same way?

I didn't have enough evidence for a prosecution but it still triggered me leaving so it was a good thing.

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SummerIsComing234 · 03/06/2016 22:38

Hi yes I would still go ahead. Logical me thinks that if that happened then yes it would trigger the same. I have left and admittted most things to friends and a lot to family however ended up coming back for multiple reasons. I am still emotionally disconnected to the assaults I think as I have blanked them so long but I know to get the old me back I need to confront it properly and part of that is reporting it. I am doing it through rasac but it's a particular form I could do on my own if I wanted to.

But yes I have told gp and in contact with womens aid and have solicitor appointment.

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SummerIsComing234 · 03/06/2016 22:45

Also sorry for question but was child custody an issue for you? I have never reported anything but do have witnesses to one physical event. But had been warned may be 50/50 custody (main reason I'm back and trying to get head straight)

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TheNIghtManagersWife · 04/06/2016 14:08

I took the children with me and he has not contested that, so no issue.

Try doing the Freedom Programme or read Lundy Bancroft Why does he do that?

Both helped me immensely during my wobbles.

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SummerIsComing234 · 05/06/2016 08:45

Thanks yes I have read why does he do that and have it on kindle to refresh myself at any point. Waiting to hear from women's aid after my first assessment appointment but will ask about doing the freedom programme too.

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