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Fog from constant harrassment/bullying

(4 Posts)
OctoberCarrot Mon 30-May-16 09:03:13

My h verbally abuses and ridicules me. Anything I do is criticised, anything I try is commented on, anything I wear is laughed at or critiqued. I am in a fog. I don't do anything without questioning myself and even simple tasks take forever as I have no confidence any more. Besides leaving him how can I help myself? How can I tebuild the little confidence that I had? I have holidays coming up so really want to use this time to regroup so I can give my children the best.

Thanks.

SandyY2K Mon 30-May-16 09:14:53

You can ignore him.
You can seek counselling.
You could do the same to him and scoff at his every word

Then...... You can ask why you want to be with a man who treats you like this, because you don't treat a person you love that way. When you got married and he vowed to love and cherish you, how does this fit in with those vows.

You can gain all the confidence and self esteem in the world, but if your husband still ridicules you, then you need to leave him before you snap. You're only human and that behaviour from him will destroy you. You shouldn't have to endure it.

OctoberCarrot Tue 31-May-16 08:50:38

You are right about ultimately leaving him but that is a hard step and I want and need to be strong for that. I think I al going to write some thoughts on holiday. Just get things down to try and defog. Maybe thoughts and then an action plan. I will need it. I am absolutely dreading the holiday but am hoping it works for DC as it very easily could be the last "family" holiday.

hellsbellsmelons Tue 31-May-16 08:58:29

Contact Womens Aid.
They can help you with local support services.
When speaking with WA ask them about your nearest Freedom Programme course. Enrol on it and do it.
If you can't get to the course then you can do it on-line.
This course will help you with all sorts of things.
Your low self esteem being one of them.
You KNOW you have to leave so start getting information together.
The more informed you are the more 'power' you will have in this situation.
Contact citizens advice and speak to them about benefits, finances, housing, tax credits.
You don't have to leave now but knowing your situation as and when you do, will really help you.
There is nothing you can do about your DH.
He's a nasty abusive bully and he won't change.
You need to make plans to get away.
WA can help you with all of that.
You are setting your DC up for a life of being an abuser or an abuse victim.
The cycle will continue unless you break that cycle.
You know and you've realised, now you need to start to take action to protect yourself and your DC!

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