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Husband doing monkey dance

(13 Posts)
bettawithpancetta Sun 22-May-16 15:43:19

He's a tall man and big and when he's cross he does this sort of monkey dance around me as he talks- has anyone else experienced this and found it vaguely threatening?

Perbsy Sun 22-May-16 15:46:13

Well I can sort of imagine it, and it might well make me feel a bit nervous.

RiceCrispieTreats Sun 22-May-16 16:28:14

Is he implying a kind of physical threat to you?

bettawithpancetta Sun 22-May-16 16:40:46

He just rants at me if he feels I am implying he is in any way at fault or to blame.

RiceCrispieTreats Sun 22-May-16 19:14:45

Ah, he's one of those. They don't make good partners.

AntiHop Sun 22-May-16 19:16:51

That sounds really unpleasant.

fuzzywuzzy Sun 22-May-16 19:20:19

How long have you been together?

Cocoabutton Sun 22-May-16 19:27:28

Do you mean he circles you, so you need to keep up with where he is? Unpleasant and unnerving, never mind the ranting.

winchester1 Sun 22-May-16 19:29:46

Not with a partner but with work colleagues. I would just stand still and refuse to look up, move etc to hold eye contact, eventually they had to stand still a suitable distance away to talk to me.

MadeMan Sun 22-May-16 20:16:17

"Can't, stop, doing... the monkey!"

CantAffordtoLive Sun 22-May-16 20:31:59

I'm sorry but this made me laugh. My Ex actually did 'hopping mad' smile It wasn't good at the time, although, I admit I did find it amusing. I am struggling to imagine a 'monkey dance' though.

I am sure this isn't good, sorry. sad

bettawithpancetta Sun 22-May-16 21:23:34

No sometimes I do want to laugh at him. Love the Simpsons. He just semi apologised to me for some non descript incident earlier but then as soon as I tried to explain that it was not really what he said but that he made me anxious that he did his usual thing of raising his voice, telling me why I make him behave in this way and then when in exasperation MY voice gets louder or shrill he accuses me of somehow acting like him. I ended up telling him to Just leave me alone as he makes me feel So stressed out and then he says ' you Leave ME alone'.... It's always the same. Luckily our toddler is asleep. And I made him a nice supper all just to
Keep peace and have a bit of peace for myself. So deflated.

Resilience16 Mon 23-May-16 21:11:04

Urk,him telling you it's you that makes him behave this way is a red flag to me. His behaviour makes you feel threatened and anxious (your words), but when you try and discuss it he blames you? Sounds like classic EA to me. You are trying to "keep the peace", which is code for trying not to antagonize him and walking on egg shells...
I was in a relationship like this, the rants got worse and more frequent and I eventually saw sense and got out, but not before I'd begun to doubt myself and think that this toxic behaviour was normal.
Please read up on emotional abuse (and I bet you will be able to recognise patterns and controlling behaviours) and seriously consider your options.
Good luck x

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