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Finding this hard

(12 Posts)
vintagesun Wed 18-May-16 11:54:00

dp had a ea with a woman from his work, they kissed but that's all (I believe him). He's more than proved he's sorry and we've been really good since it happened (about 8 months ago). He's in the process of changing jobs and we're moving up north because I said it would help me get over it if we started somewhere fresh.
The problem is the ow, We have mutual friend on Facebook so every now and then her profile picture pops up on my newsfeed and it's a picture of her and dp at a work
Night out. She is always swapping her work days so she can work with him (if he finds out before hand he always swaps his too but it's not always in time). I have heard from mutual friends that she uses other people's Facebook to go through my posts (my Facebook is very private) I just want her to go away. It's been like this for months. Dp wasn't able to switch jobs right away because He wasn't able to find another job (not through lack of trying he has been to a lot of interviews just no luck). He has now found one and we are moving in a month (notice period). But I'm just getting sick of her appearing everywhere.
I'm not making out he's blameless, there was a time where I refused to take him back but we worked on things and are getting to a good place but she is driving me crazy. I just want her to leave us alone.

Funko Wed 18-May-16 12:15:45

Block her then you can see anything she does and vice versa

vintagesun Wed 18-May-16 12:28:56

I will. It doesn't stop her with the other stuff, like the fact she uses mutual friends to go on my Facebook. (As soon as I work out which friend it is that's allowing her to do this they're blocked too) I just want this month to go quickly so i never have to deal with her again.

HolditFinger Wed 18-May-16 12:46:11

I'd say block her and all mutual friends. I wouldn't be happy about any so called friends of mine remaining friends with the OW.

vintagesun Wed 18-May-16 12:57:10

They aren't friends, more like acquaintances than anything. I think I'll do that.

Herald Wed 18-May-16 13:12:39

Why don't you come off Facebook for a while and when you have moved and settled set up a fresh account ..

vintagesun Wed 18-May-16 13:14:41

I did consider that but I have family who live abroad and it's the only way I keep in touch with them. But maybe for the month it would be a good idea.

UptheAnty Wed 18-May-16 14:59:36

You are allowing the ow too much space in your head...
I mean how sad and desperate is this woman that's she's stalking your fb through mutual friends??
Has she no self respect?

The door has been closed on your & dh's life and now she's attempting to look in the window.

Concentrate on you & dh - she really is nothing.
Only 1 month to go, hold your head up, don't stumble at the final hurdle.
It's time to look forward and create new happier memories for yourself.


KittensandKnitting Wed 18-May-16 15:09:37

You could change all your family on FB to be close friends and then only allow "close friends" to see everything you do. That way you won't loose your contact with your family.

You can also limit all old posts and I think photos etc - that way you can see what others are doing they can't see what your doing so it will stop her even if she uses a so called friends account to check up on you

I actually deleted Facebook not so long ago and was so liberating smile but not ideal in your situation and why should you based on the acts of this person.

Otherwise it is quiet easy to do a backup of your Facebook account, delete it and start again. Or deactivate it for a bit.

Kn33 Thu 19-May-16 13:48:53

Similar situation here...
The OW actually liked a picture of our DC on Facebook 
Blocked her..
DP blocked her...
If the silly cow wants to go to the trouble of using friends to stalk she can feel free, makes her a very sad woman in my opinion 
Just ignore OP  x

MatrixReloaded Thu 19-May-16 14:07:55

Does he have to attend these works nights out ?

vintagesun Thu 19-May-16 23:13:06

It's an old picture. I've put everyone I think she would ask to look on restricted and blocked her now.

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