I am having an absolutely meltdown today and need some urgent advice. I'm in a relationship with a man I turned my whole life upside down for. We've been together 3 years and we live together with my children from my previous relationship. We used to have an amazing sex life when we first met. I always knew he had a high sex drive - but so do I, so it worked perfectly. About a year into the relationship it took a nose dive and has stagnated there since. We have sex maybe once every few weeks - and its basically him getting off with no care whether I am satisfied or not. I know he watches porn. I don't like it for a whole lot of reasons but if I can't see it and its not effecting me, I turn a blind eye. Our lack of sex has bothered me a lot, and I'm starting to feel like he can't wait for me to leave the house so he can watch porn and masturbate. So this weekend I went out with friends in the afternoon - came home to a lovely used tissue on our bed. Great - he's watching porn and masturbating and I haven't had any satisfaction for months - literally months. It pissed me off. Am I not attractive to him anymore? I'm clearly not doing it for him - and if I'm not satisfied then whats the point? Then two days after I come home and I can see he has been cleaning the bed sheets down. I check his browser - and there is it, some grim homemade gang bang. I know think this has been going on the whole time - I have put our lack of sex down to contentment and life getting in the way. But now I know he doesn't need me because he is satisfying himself. What do I do? If I raise it with him he'll get angry and embarrassed. I don't want a sexless life - but if I leave I am uprooting my kids again. I love him - we have a good life - we laugh, we spend so much time together its untrue - we enjoy each others company immensely. But I can't just put up with this. Help!!
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