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Passive agressive 'friend' since ive had DD

(3 Posts)
polkadotsandcherries Tue 17-May-16 15:11:12

this may a be a bit ranty but oh well here goes....get a cuppa....
So I got a 'friend' we will call her babs has just slowly become the most passive agressive person of all time and its all really quite sad.
My DD is 2 now and babs seems to refuse to acknowledge DD exists? its really beyond me. shes the only one of the friends ( I use the word losely these days) who doesn't even bother to ask how my DD is, and I mean like EVER.
I get that some people feel like they shouldnt pretend to like other peoples kids but to ask after my kids general well being isnt much of a push is it?
This isnt about whether or not someone is maternal I think its just common sense and a normal thing to do when i friend becomes a mum to ask after her brood/ family etc.
Perhaps a bit of background we have been friends since uni (over 10 years say) a few years ago we had a big falling out with a few other member of our circle, there seemed to be a problem about me wanting to get married and the usual cynisim and perhaps even tones jealously were rife. I realised these poeple were not friends and dis associated myself as did babs as she seemed to have her own issues with these no gooders. So in essence babs stood up for me as she had just started to embark on a relationship herself( more on that later). I know people move on however though ive been through alot of changes in these 5 or so years I have always been around for friends, im not one of those who sacrifices seeing my girlfriends to be with my man, unlike babs. Luckily most of my friends are reasonable and always try to meet me in an afternoons or so and so it doesnt impact on my night times etc. but obvs ever now and again im cool to go out in the evening just not with DD which is fine on occasion. Babs however even goes as far to cancel with me to be with BF or just says no to me if I try and plan something because it doesnt fit in with any possible plans she might have with her BF. she tends to almost always put her BF first. bit juvinile really but it is her first ever proper relationship. I guess everyone is different and thats fine I suppose
I remember when I first broke the news I was expecting she was happy for me, it seemed. But a few DAYS later on one of her self indulgent FB statuses( and there are many) there it was a thinly veiled dig.....it read something like, so the BF said we wont have kids but we will have a glam life in a huge house with nice cars abroad on live on the med somewhere'. it was a bit pathetic, who says you cant have both? anyways sorry I digress...... the timing of it was interesting, I thought it was hormones and me being silly but I actually believe it was a dig. probably worth mentioning but at the time of the falling out with the others she mentioned that if her BF proposed she would say yes, now that was 6 years ago and without gloating (its just fact) I have since been proposed to, have got married had a child and become what I consider a grown up( no offence to anyone who hasnt got kids just speaking about my own circumstance here)
anways this is really wordy I've been holding this in for a while it seems. theres so much more but no relevant here right now.
Does anyone else have a 'babs'in their life? its like this person has just decided her BF is its only focus in life and has taken away her friendship without discussing it with me first

TheNaze73 Tue 17-May-16 16:03:26

She sounds like a knob. It's an d adage but, there's a lot true about mates not dates. People who abandon their friends when they hook up with someone boil my piss. If it all goes TU for 'babe' & her BF, you know who she'll come running to?
She sounds bitter, twisted & jealous to me. You have all she wants. Don't let it get to you though, it's her problem not yours.

pocketsaviour Tue 17-May-16 18:00:50

It sounds like she has a case of crippling envy. Maybe it's time to just let the friendship lapse?

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