I have name changed for this as I have spoken to the odd person about this in RL. For background info DH and I have been together for about 23 years and we have two young adult DC.
My SIL died about a week ago. She was admitted to hospital and two weeks later the decision to turn off her ventilator was made. So although her death was expected in the end it was till a shock.
My DH has lost both his parents and she was his only sibling so it has been difficult for him.
Although DH and me have been together for a good long while, occasions where both sides of the family were together have been few and far between to the extent that if my mother saw SIL, BIL or DN in the street she probably wouldn't realize.
The comments (all by text) I have had to put up with have made me cringe. I have been gobsmacked at the lack of understanding. The two texts that have really got to me have been 'when you get to my age I think it is my turn next' and ''I couldn't bring myself to phone. Even though we didn't know her. It happens to me every time I hear someone is dead'.
I understand that when you get to a certain age you probably worry that it may be you next but surely it is not appropriate to tell that to people who have just lost someone.
However you may feel surely you suck it up and telephone your SonIL, DD and DGC to speak to them. My DC were very young when DH's parents died so this is the first time they are dealing with a family death where they understand what is going on.
At the risk of making it all about me - I am so upset I could cry and at the same time I m so angry. I haven't told my DH. He is normally quite laid back but I think this would just be too much. I just feel so sorry for DH.
It wouldn't be so bad but this is is just an another addition to the long line of shit things she has said or done.
Sorry to go on. Please feel free to tell me I am being precious - I need to have some perspective
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Relationships
It's not all about you mother (bereavement related)
20 replies
Itsnotallaboutyou · 15/05/2016 20:51
OP posts:
Theymakemefeelstressed ·
29/05/2016 23:53
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