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What is the best way to win someone back when they have dumped you?

(48 Posts)
Becoolio Thu 12-May-16 21:31:58

If someone tells you they don't want to see you any more, what is the best way of winning them back?

These are the ones I thought of:
- act cool as if you don't care
- give a little goodbye speech
- say something about how wonderful they are/declare undying love
- say how upset/heartbroken you are
- say something which shows you are leaving the door open
- act gutted/angry
- accidentally on purpose bump in to them somewhere looking fab
- tell them you are seeing someone else
- tell them you won't let them go without a fight
- act friendly and send them the odd text as if you are still interested in their life
- leave it.
Note: I am intending to do nothing, just wondering.

The only two that have worked for me in the past are act as if I don't care and start seeing someone else.
What about you?

LadyTrevelyan Thu 12-May-16 21:36:25

I don't think any of them would work.

Stardust160 Thu 12-May-16 21:36:48

I would never beg anyone back after they dumped me.I would have kept my dignity and I certainly wouldn't have them back if they came grovelling either.

chocshortbread Thu 12-May-16 21:38:32

confused Why do you want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you? I've been dumped and dumped people, as have most people, its best just to let them go and move on. The ones I've dumped couldn't do anything to 'win me back' as I didn't want to have a relationship with them any more. But the worst thing you can do is say you won't let them go without a fight/declare undying love imo. I suppose if the dumper was unsure then doing nothing or sending the very odd text might keep the door open- but you'd still end up with someone's half hearted interest.

BubsAndMoo Thu 12-May-16 21:39:09

That all sounds like emotional manipulation. If somebody doesn't want to be with me, then I wouldn't want to be with them. I prefer partners that are into me. Call me old fashioned smile

ChardonnayKnickertonSmythe Thu 12-May-16 21:39:56

Leave it and move on.

fitzbilly Thu 12-May-16 21:40:27

You can't.

Why would you want to manipulate someone into going back to you when they had already dumped you?! Very strange.

quicklydecides Thu 12-May-16 21:41:43

If you are twelve try any of them.

Psycobabble Thu 12-May-16 21:41:46

Assuming this isn't a wind up

The best thing to do is

Listen to the words they have spoken "I don't want to be with you"
Consult dictionary if unclear of meaning of those words
Move on

Becoolio Thu 12-May-16 21:42:47

When my exh left and wanted to come back a year later he criticised me for just letting him go.

haveacupoftea Thu 12-May-16 21:42:59

You don't. You move on to someone who does want you.

WriteforFun1 Thu 12-May-16 21:42:59

OP are you 12?

WriteforFun1 Thu 12-May-16 21:43:52

we cross posted

sorry, your ex left and then criticised you for being civil and letting him leave? He's an arse.

FeckinCrutches Thu 12-May-16 21:45:01

Jesus Christ is this a DM journo again? If it's not, get some self respect.

EweAreHere Thu 12-May-16 21:46:06

Why would anyone want to 'win back' someone who doesn't want to be with you?

Move on.

Becoolio Thu 12-May-16 21:46:27

I feel stupid now confused.

NedStarksHead Thu 12-May-16 21:47:11

All of those would work somewhat alright if you were 12 and had just started secondary school & got dumped by your first boyfriend...

NedStarksHead Thu 12-May-16 21:49:32

Honestly? You should feel stupid.

Sorry, but, not only do your suggestions wreak of desperation they're like something out of a mills and boon novel?

When do those kind of things actually work in real life?

All of that aside, why would you want to be with someone who has no interest in being with you? confused

Becoolio Thu 12-May-16 21:51:36

I think it's a reasonable question. Loads of people want their partner back after they have split up.

I have had wine though.

RedOnHerHedd Thu 12-May-16 21:52:40

OP, I'm guessing your DP has left you? Are you ok?

WriteforFun1 Thu 12-May-16 21:53:05

you sound so young, I'm quite flummoxed that you actually have an ex-husband....

Psycobabble Thu 12-May-16 21:53:14

They may well do

However you asked what would we do and thus far the people who have answered clearly wouldn't do anything but let them crack on with leaving

Hang around though you may get others who will add to your list !!

BubsAndMoo Thu 12-May-16 21:53:32

Congrats on him being an ExH, that sounds like it was a wise move smile

AnyFucker Thu 12-May-16 21:53:55

OP has said she isn't intending to do any of that crappy list.

It is know that right ?

SoThatHappened Thu 12-May-16 21:54:34

Vanish off the face of the earth. Let them go. Maybe they miss you maybe not.

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