I have name changed because I can easily be identified from previous posts and a family member is on MN.
Long story short, my parents and grandparents hate my (now ex) DP. He was a prick, he was selfish and we argued a lot, finally ending things for good a few months ago after an ultimatum from my family - him or us. My family were really happy that I finished with him, i had to because i relied on their support financially and they have a fantastic relationship with my 2 children. ExDP wasn't happy at being asked to move out but he did, we keep in light contact and he sees the kids regularly. He lives in the next town so he travels here to see them, takes them swimming, Park etc and one evening a week at my house to have dinner and put them to bed so i can go see friends etc. To be honest im happy just now, we are not arguing because we are not living together, we have kept things as civil and friendly as possible for the kids sake and this is working for us.
My family (my grandmother mainly) are absolutely furious that he is visiting us and i had a nasty phone call last night telling me how much of a disappointment i am and that I've hurt the family loads by allowing him access to his own kids and allowing him to be friends with me.
I was and still am quite upset, I've been told to cut him off completely or never speak to my family again. Yes he was an arse most of the relationship but to be honest im no angel and started a lot of arguments that could have been let go. They know this.
The final straw has been that I've found out my gran has had people following me, spying on me to see when im with him ane where we go to and she's kept a notebook of days and times he has been at the house. Im absolutely fucking fuming with this, i feel like i have no privacy whatsoever and can't live a life. I need to make it clear that we are not abd won't be getting back together, it's a civil adult friendship only, he does not stay over.
What do I do?
My family were amazing the past few months, helping me to move house, redecorated for me, helping with the kids etc and im beyond grateful but they are using it to control me. Im nearly 30 and have never had a choice, everything has to be run past them and they have never liked any of my boyfriends, nobody is ever good enough it's ridiculous now. My mum goes through my Facebook asking who each and every person is and how i know them. It's so frustrating.
They have been really nipping at me to get maintenance sorted but get angry when he sees the kids...we have a private arrangement cash wise which again is working great.
Sorry if this is written badly im a bit upset and trying to word it best i can.
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Advice needed about parents interference
12 replies
ChangeyNameyPosty · 05/05/2016 13:09
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