Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Don't want to be alone, or don't want to be without you?

(8 Posts)
WhoMovedMyFish Thu 21-Apr-16 20:36:24

F***. Been single (separated after years of abusing relationship with husband). Started seeing new man very recently, like him, lots in common, he's also single but with kids (never married). We have fun together and the sex is amazing!! I've missed intimacy so very much as it was completely absent during my marriage.

So the other night he stayed over at mine, DTD etc all lovely. After he says he explains that he doesn't like being alone - he's used to having someone in his life/house/company etc, and tells me he's not sure if he likes me & wants to be with me, or whether he's just with me cos he doesn't want to be alone!!

He also appears quite close with his ex (mother of his kids) - comes running/does errands when she says etc.

What do I do here? Do I quit with my dignity or persevere & see what happens? I don't know how to take the 'not sure if I like you or like not being alone' comment? Is this normal honesty from men now or is he playing me incase someone better comes along?

Arrrggghhhh!!

HuskyLover1 Thu 21-Apr-16 20:47:38

What a twat. So, he has sex with you, and then comes out with that Gem of a comment? What a Turd. I would dump him pronto. That will give him a chance to think about how he feels. Here's what to text:

Hi Dick (insert real name). I've been thinking about what you said last night, (about whether you're not sure if you really like me, or whether you're just with me as you don't like being alone). I'm really looking for a lovely relationship with someone, and I just don't think it's going to be you, if you are having these negative thoughts so early on. I've enjoyed our time together and I truly wish you the best going forward. Good luck. Best wishes WhoMovedMyFish. x

RedRainRocks Thu 21-Apr-16 21:06:15

Perhaps he ought to spend some time alone and figure it out! Whilst you find someone who cherishes and values you for who you are... He isn't sure if he likes you?! What a complete selfish prick.

WhoMovedMyFish Thu 21-Apr-16 21:07:52

Thank you Husky, I'm so sad - don't wanna dump him cos I miss the intimacy, but I get that I'm going to get hurt here :-(

HuskyLover1 Thu 21-Apr-16 21:16:33

Plenty of guys around who will give you intimacy shag you what you don't need is this utter bullshit that will erode your well being.

Choceeclair123 Thu 21-Apr-16 21:16:53

What a prick! U DTD and afterwards he says that?! Get rid!

hobybabo Thu 21-Apr-16 21:38:13

God he's one of those "just being honest" types. They think they're being noble by telling the truth, and that you have no right to be angry (he would probably try to make you feel this way too) but in fact, what possible benefit could you get from that statement? I liken it to the ones who say "I'm not sure if I want to be in this relationship" and then hang around while they "make up their mind". No way. Put your foot down, you're not to be treated that way.

pinkyredrose Thu 21-Apr-16 21:42:32

Well at least you found out earlier on that he's a wanker. Cut your losses and move on, he'd try to run rings round you if you keep seeing him.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now