Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Surprise pregnancy at a ripe old age...scared

(101 Posts)
GoodGawdAlmighty Wed 30-Mar-16 21:56:07

Period is a few days late. Felt nauseous this morning, so decided to do a test, thinking 'this is very very unlikely...but I do feel a bit weird...so...'

Anyway, it was positive. No contraceptive failure that we knew of, but obviously there has been.

I'm 39. DH is 51. Our DC are 12 and 8. We had definitely decided we didn't want any more children after DC2 was born. DH had been looking into getting the snip. God, we are both old. Well, DH is old (sorry grin).... Yet after the initial shock this morning, I feel strangely happy and excited.

Are we too old? Am I mad to be feeling a bit crazily excited? Can I do this to my old geezer? Seriously...need some words of wisdom, as my head is spinning.

GoodGawdAlmighty Wed 30-Mar-16 21:57:30

I should add, DH doesn't know yet. Away for work until Friday. He is a lovely man and I know he will manage whatever we do, but I feel strangely guilty...I dont know why, exactly.

WifOfBif Wed 30-Mar-16 21:59:02

You're not too old at all! Can I whisper a little congratulations? flowers

NorksAreMessy Wed 30-Mar-16 22:00:58

Presumably, he knows where babies come from? I think I might be more worried about the 12 year old's reaction smile

A big congratulations from me flowers

Canshopwillshop Wed 30-Mar-16 22:03:33

Congratulations! I was 40 when I had my DD and 42 when I had DS . My DH is 4 years older than me. We don't feel old and have quite a few friends in a similar position. Good luck with your pregnancy.

BreakfastLunchPasta Wed 30-Mar-16 22:03:35

God, no - you're not too old!

Congrats grin three is the magic number, you know!

elephantoverthehill Wed 30-Mar-16 22:04:47

Wow! My Mum had a little surprise too at the age of 40. Well actually two little surprises. I had my DD at a similar age. It is great news and keeps you staying fitter. flowers

ExitPursuedByABear Wed 30-Mar-16 22:05:32

I was 40 and DH 53 when we had DD

SirChenjin Wed 30-Mar-16 22:07:44

Congratulations!! flowers

You're not too old at all - I was a week off 38, DH was 44 when DS3 (also a surprise) was born. My friend is currently in labour with a surprise aged 42 (her husband is 40). Late babies are ace - and very much adored by everyone whose baby making days are coming a close smile

mayhew Wed 30-Mar-16 22:09:04

Dear God woman, it's no age!
I'm a midwife and the two oldest clients I had with surprise babies were 50 and 53.
My friend's mother had a surprise at 45. 20 years after her sterilisation.......

VocationalGoat Wed 30-Mar-16 22:09:59

I was 42 with DC3 and DH is 50 something.wink I don't feel old at all. What exactly are you worried about? You've done it all before. You have even more wisdom this time around. Congratulations! flowers

bonzo77 Wed 30-Mar-16 22:10:15

My mum was 39, dad was 42, I was very nearly 15 and my brother was 12. And then came The Baby. We all survived. It's been hard though, my parents' marriage had always been rocky. The Baby gave my mum a chance to start over: she went to uni, got a career. My parents split, then got back together. It's not been easy. But it might not have been regardless of The Baby (he's 23).

Ratbagcatbag Wed 30-Mar-16 22:10:49

I have an old dh too grin he was 49 when our dd arrived. He reckons she keeps him young. He's now 52 and loves it.

cece Wed 30-Mar-16 22:11:06

I had my last one when I was 42 so no you're not old!

cocochanel21 Wed 30-Mar-16 22:14:09

Congratulations flowers

I had dd2 at 38 also a surprise.

I have a 23YEAR age gap between my dds that really makes me feel OLDsmile.

ispymincepie Wed 30-Mar-16 22:16:25

My older dcs have been fab with my dc3. Even 12yo ds! Dd is like a second mummy, she's 9yo. Lovely age gaps actually, congratulations!

winkywinkola Wed 30-Mar-16 22:23:25

Old? You're so not old. I had dc4 at 42. Big congratulations!

I had DD at 35 and DS at 39. You're not old at all (though be prepared for sucked teeth all round from HCPs (if you live near me anyway))

Travelledtheworld Wed 30-Mar-16 22:26:25

Congratulations and thanks for sharing with us !
I was 39 when I had my youngest. You will be fine.
Hugs, and hope your DH is happy too ( bet he will be very proud...)

FirstWeTakeManhattan Wed 30-Mar-16 22:27:00

You're young normal in my social group! I was 42 and DH 51 when I had DC3. Congratulations.

f1ddlesticks Wed 30-Mar-16 22:27:16

Just got my BFP at nearly 39, DP is 48! Congrats!

BennyTheBall Wed 30-Mar-16 22:28:06

39 isn't that old! My friend is 43 and pregnant with her third.

Bisghetti Wed 30-Mar-16 22:31:38

What a surprise! Definitely not too old - I'd say your now closer to the average age of my friends when they had their first baby than you were when you had the other two. Around here you'd have been odd for having a child in your twenties!

liinyo Wed 30-Mar-16 22:32:08

That is great news. 39 is not too old at all. I don't know anyone this has happened to who hasn't been delighted with the surprise addition to the family. I hope your DH feels the same way, Congratulations.

LeaLeander Wed 30-Mar-16 22:33:31

You're not physically too old. But if I were him my heart would sink at the notion of having a child in college when I was in my 70s. That's a long slog. How will it affect your planning for retirement, travel, finances, helping elder relatives, etc? If the child were disabled or special needs and unable to be independent, how would that affect your own older years? And the siblings.

As others have said, though, I guess if the prospect really worried him he could have done something about it in advance.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now