My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Partner erections

11 replies

Agnesandmatt · 20/03/2016 01:52

HI everyone,

I am posting on Mum's net because I'm not sure where else to turn.

My partner and I have been together for for 6 years and we have lead a satisfying sex life. However, my partner has a moderate curve to his penis.

The curve does not generally interfere with penetration, but sometimes makes certain sexual positions tricky.

I am currently undergoing cancer treatment so our sex life is on hold for a year or so.

My partner is considering approaching his GP with a view to having corrective surgery, as this is a good opportunity as we are currently abstaining from sex.

I have 2 main questions:

Does anyone else have a partner with the same 'issue' and do they think that corrective surgery is required? Is a straight penis better? I am interested in hearing impartial views on this (my partner does not know that I am posting).

Secondly, has anyone else had to cope with abstinence due to a medical reason and how did your partner cope with this?

Sorry, I know that this is really 2 questions, but any assistance would be greatly received.

A x

OP posts:
Report
dratsea · 20/03/2016 03:25

Is the bend left/right or up/down?

Report
magoria · 20/03/2016 09:02

I don't know anyone who has had corrective surgery however my understanding was that they didn't like doing this sort of thing because of the risk of the scar tissue thickening and making things worse. Also there is always the risk that surgery will go wrong and could affect getting erections.

May have changed with modern times I suppose.

Report
inlectorecumbit · 20/03/2016 09:17

Sounds like Peyronie's disease.. has he spoken to GP about it before? I think surgery is only done in severe cases but l might be wrong

Report
Suddenlyseymour · 20/03/2016 09:27

I've just finished a year of treatment for breast cancer. It didn't require abstinence but certainly there were times when clearly it wasn't on the agenda - some parts of the chemo cycle, after surgery etc. the partner i had in the 3 years prior to diagnosis didn't make it past the first chemo; in some sensesthat did me a favour. My current new man; well he just understands, goes with the flow, no pressure. I have heard of women having difficulties with their partners "complaining", or being sulky, throwing strops.....i can't get my head round that. You are enduring some of the harshest treatment there is. A decent partner will make nothing of it and just accept that at certain times, sex is off the cards x

Report
RealityCheque · 20/03/2016 09:28

You have cancer that requires treatment for over a year and are worried about how your partner will cope without sex? Hmm

Curvey cocks can be wanked too.

Report
IrishDad79 · 20/03/2016 10:09

Suddenly seymour and reality cheque, the op has not said that her partner is pressuring her into sex during her treatment, but that he's going to use the year off sex to correct the curve in his penis. Read the opening post again.

Report
DarrenHardysDrongo · 20/03/2016 10:21

IrishDad, suggest you read Suddenlyseymour and Reality's posts again because you're seeing something in both posts that isn't there! Where have either of them responded as if they think OP's partner is pressurising for sex?

Report
IrishDad79 · 20/03/2016 10:31

Shit, I just re-read the op myself and saw her second question. Sorry guys, my mistake! It's Sunday morning, gimme a break!

Report
Suddenlyseymour · 20/03/2016 11:01

Irish dad, it wasn't my perception that her partner was pressuring her; in the OP she asked how people generally cope when sex isn't possible. The answer is wide varying as i have seen and experienced!

Report
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 20/03/2016 13:27

Hi OP. Google "Nesbit's Procedure". Not sure how many get done these days, or what the minimum curvature to trigger it is.

Report
Borisrules · 20/03/2016 14:49

Indication for surgery to a curvature is usually only performed when penetration is impossible. The surgery involves significant shortening of the erection so the patient ends up with a much (sometimes up to 2cm depending on how bad the curve is) shorter but usable erection.
Other risks include bleeding, infection reduced sensation and lumps on the shaft of the penis from non-dissolvable sutures. And the patient is usually circumcised as part of the procedure.
It's not a common procedure (for the reasons above) but works well in selected patients. Because it's not common, if considering this surgery it ought to be done by someone who does a lot of Nesbitts and has a lot of experience.
Other things that help include vitamin E tablets, and some urologists will inject the area that is scarred and causing the curvature which sometimes helps.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.