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AIBU to ask my husband (nicely) to stop starting his sentences to me with the word, Don't?

(13 Posts)
EasyToEatTiger Sun 13-Mar-16 20:48:26

He takes it as a personal insult. A vicious attack. I have noticed that a great much of what he says to me starts with the word, Don't. As in, Don't think like that. Don't say that. Don't this don't that. I said I found it hurtful to be spoken to in such a way. Cue sulk.

HolgerDanske Sun 13-Mar-16 21:01:47

Agree. He is not your boss, nor the keeper of what you can and cannot do. Ugh that would really piss me off.

annandale Sun 13-Mar-16 21:04:58

Next time he says it try rephrasing, as in 'Are you saying you feel upset when I do xYZ?' Then he may confirm or deny what you say, as in 'Yes I feel upset' or 'No, I feel ANGRY' and you're getting somewhere.

Alternatively he may just say 'Don't try that psychobabble with me' but it's worth a try.

EasyToEatTiger Sun 13-Mar-16 21:08:17

I think it is his favourite word. I am mightily pissed off with him. It means he doesn't have to listen. He doesn't have to take responsibility. He flies into a rage if I say he has done something that I find hurtful. It boils down to, everything is my fault. He is a wanker. Literally. Yuck.

DoreenLethal Sun 13-Mar-16 21:12:30

Could you say 'don't you think it is time you fucked off?'

Fairenuff Sun 13-Mar-16 22:27:54

Next time say 'Don't tell me what to do' and then sing this song at the top of your voice.

You don't own me

MistressDeeCee Sun 13-Mar-16 23:24:54

I think id be tempted to try Fairenuff's solution with Mr Bossy Boots. Although anyone speaking to me like that would be told very firmly not to, and to not expect a reply or any attention from me until they learned some manners

Marchate Sun 13-Mar-16 23:30:43

It's recommended, when talking to young children, not to start a sentence with "don't..." Because they only hear the next bit

Don't run = run
Don't shout = shout
Don't touch that = touch that
etc

You could adopt the hearing and comprehension abilities of a child!!

NNalreadyinuse Sun 13-Mar-16 23:34:56

Start your next sentence with 'Don't come home' . Follow it up with 'I am changing the locks'. He sounds like a proper joy to live with!

AnyFucker Sun 13-Mar-16 23:40:17

Yabu to say it nicely

FillingMakesMeVom Mon 14-Mar-16 00:20:17

I do not get the issue , is it because the word don't is annoying?

haveacupoftea Mon 14-Mar-16 00:27:31

Depends.

Don't go to the cinema with your sister = wrong

Don't call me stupid in front of the kids = ok maybe he has a point

Too many variables for us to make a judgement.

Yseulte Mon 14-Mar-16 00:36:47

Don’t put mustard in your custard – Michael Rosen

Don’t do,
Don’t do,
Don’t do that.
Don’t pull faces,
Don’t tease the cat.

Don’t pick your ears,
Don’t be rude at school.
Who do they think I am?

Some kind of fool?

One day
they’ll say
Don’t put toffee in my coffee
don’t pour gravy on the baby
don’t put beer in his ear
don’t stick your toes up his nose.

Don’t put confetti on the spaghetti
and don’t squash peas on your knees.

Don’t put ants in your pants
don’t put mustard in the custard

don’t chuck jelly at the telly

and don’t throw fruit at a computer
don’t throw fruit at a computer.

Don’t what?
Don’t throw fruit at a computer.
Don’t what?
Don’t throw fruit at a computer.
Who do they think I am?
Some kind of fool?

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