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The creepiest man you've ever dated...

(138 Posts)
lottielou7 Mon 07-Mar-16 14:40:25

Following from my thread, just to make me feel better that it's not only me who attracts these kind of people.

I seem to have had a run of them lately. Before the last one there was a university lecturer. I thought how nice he seemed until he sent me a picture of his wife's grave. I had no idea to respond to it!

lottielou7 Mon 07-Mar-16 18:29:49


lottielou7 Mon 07-Mar-16 18:30:40

Years ago someone told a story on here about a man who had a willy like a peperami and I so want to hear that again grin

Nelliethenailnipper Mon 07-Mar-16 20:23:34

willy like a peperami I want to hear that too grin

For me, the chap who wanted me to buy him a £££ Jo Malone candle on our first date!!! Or the one who frog marched me to a cash-point and asked me to withdraw £ to give to him so he could pay for the date as he had no money! Then there was the one who lied about his 'International lifestyle'...... The creepiest one though was the one who kept trolling me with fake dating profiles. I got so good at sussing them in the end I would just message back a dreary 'Not you again'... and then block.

roundmyway Mon 07-Mar-16 20:28:53

I briefly spoke to one on Tinder who tracked me down on Facebook through a mutual friend after I stopped talking to him ..
Abused the shit out me verbally,
I blocked him.
Got a big apology the next day via the mutual friend.
Unblocked quite recently (about 18 months down the line) & he's been pestering me since about letting him redeem himself for being such a tadger,
So needy !

Another tinder one -
Can I get your whatsapp so I can show you a pic of these great shoes I have,
Suede Dalmatian print efforts,
Then went onto show me he was famous as someone tweeted about seeing this guy in the bar with hideous Dalmatian shoes on.

Tbh I don't OLD or Tinder sometimes I just get fed up & hunt for these roasters !

Not single at the mo but even if I was I Never go further than talking to them but I attract a weirdo like !

iklboo Mon 07-Mar-16 20:39:35

The one who told me on our first date I'd have to convert to Catholicism & our children (who would be twins) would be brought up Catholic.

The one who, after we'd slept together, jumped out of bed at three in the morning so he could be ready in the morning for confession about being led astray & tempted by a fallen woman.

I started asking questions about religious inclination after those two.

The one who boasted that his loan had been paid into his account AND that his insurance had paid out but told me that I would be paying for the whole meal because he 'believed women should be taught a lesson about paying for things'.

doodlejump1980 Mon 07-Mar-16 20:47:23

One creepy guy asked me on the first date if I wanted to see the liposuction scars on his man-boobs. Er naw. Then proceeded to tell me that I wasn't ready for a relationship because I had body issues (through not wanting to see his lipo scars...) and ended up kinda stalking me, leaving flowers on top of my car, turning up at my work. Had a lucky escape there I think!!

Quityabitchen Mon 07-Mar-16 20:52:43

The guy who told me he lived in an apartment in Hebden Bridge and worked as a landscape gardener, when in reality, he lived with his parents and had never had a job. He was 41 and slept in a single bed with a Kylie Minogue calendar on the wall. More sad than creepy to be fair.

trowelmonkey1 Mon 07-Mar-16 21:31:59

One bloke I dated seemed OK, but we weren't meant to be and I ended it. Several years later my sister started working at the same company as my ex and he almost immediately began hitting on her. She flatly refused to have anything to do him, not only because of our relationship, but also because he had since married someone else in their office.

That was years ago, but even now he occasionally pops on Facebook and tries his luck with my sister. My sister is my best mate - she knows all of the intimate details of our relationship and, in her own words, would rather die old and lonely that go any anywhere near him grin

PrancingQueen Mon 07-Mar-16 21:37:37

God. Where do I start...

One had a penis like an asparagus. I swear to god. Weirdest looking thing ever, all long and spindly thin with a little tiny bell-end.
Shame really because he was gorgeous looking but he was an arrogant sod so I declined his gracious offer of a shag with his vegetable like knob and ran for the hills.

Another was trying to kiss me in the back of a taxi and he was trying to get an invite in for 'coffee'. He then proceeded to start really yanking on my hair (this was the first date) as it was obviously his 'thing'. Not mine though sonny so piss off

Another more recent one, who chatted me up at work then started emailing. Turned out his wife became severely disabled last year so he was obvs looking for a convenient leg over...

I attract only the princes amongst men.

MagicalHamSandwich Mon 07-Mar-16 21:49:39

I didn't even properly date him. Met him at a political event and he asked me out for a drink, which I only agreed to because my best friend insisted I'd been single for too long and at least we shared our politics.

He took me to some grandpa pub (I was 20, FFS!) and we had a beer each and went home. I decided not to see him again, ever.

He then started texting and would make up the most insane stories about being mugged and beaten up only to confess 10 minutes later that he'd invented it in order to find out if I worried about him. When I stopped responding he decided to turn up at my place and sat in the staircase of my block of flats for 8 hours straight. At that point I decided to phone my very hulky but decidedly gay friend, who came over and helped me fake very loud sex noises just behind my front door. This finally made him walk away - but only after leaving shreds of torn flowers all over the entrance.

Saw him about 7 years later on the street. He walked up to me and told me I'd broken his heart. I got scared and ran ...

Sidge Mon 07-Mar-16 21:56:30

Not me but my friend (honestly!)

Her first date many years ago with a guy who was tall, dark, handsome, charming, the whole package (apparently).

Who asked her over dessert whether she liked to be strangled during sex shock

jayho Mon 07-Mar-16 22:04:14

Not dated, thankfully...

He who has gone down in dating lore as 'Mr Limpy'.

OLD, met for lunch, he carefully explained, whilst we were perusing the menus, his need to use viagra for successful sex and that, as he had a gammy leg, only me on top positions would work.

He went on to explain that he made a living by gambling.

Because I'm British I stayed for lunch blush

I made my excuses and didn't have pud, natch, total rebel.

lottielou7 Mon 07-Mar-16 23:09:31

I had one guy tell me that his dad had given him £26K to pay the debts he racked up due to his cocaine habit - he said this about 5 minutes after I arrived. Strangely enough I didn't see him again! Some funny stories on this thread!

ladylambkin Tue 08-Mar-16 00:37:46

Jayho....I think I dated the same man shock did his first name start with M?

pigeonpoo Tue 08-Mar-16 01:00:46

I never dated him as such but met through a Christian OLD website and in my naive nineteen year old new born again Christian dullally replied to his message saying I wasn't interested romantically but he was welcome to attend a church I went to with a group of friends sometime as he'd also said he was looking for a church.

I thought I was being super responsible inviting him to a group setting with a group of friends

Day after I got a stream of emails about why I wasn't Christian as I'd date him if I was a true Christian rather than hurt him

Then ones the following day about why he was forgiving me since he was a true Christian and he'd decided I could date him again

I got a new email address, ended my subscription to the site, and changed my phone number and avoided going to the church for a while

When I eventually revisited the church some months on (which wasn't even my home church - just a youth drawing Megachurch my friends sometimes went along to the odd programme at) - he was there!!!

Luckily my friends refused to let him speak to me. I honestly don't know what happened after that. Never saw him again or really thought about him till this thread!

GinBunny Tue 08-Mar-16 01:02:32

The guy that put pins through a condom so I would get pregnant by him and he would "own" me.
Or the guy that tried to force my car off the motorway because I'd dumped him.
Or the guy that had sex with me after his mate's girlfriend spiked my drink because she thought I was after him.
I'm so glad I met my lovely DH.

YerAWizardHarry Tue 08-Mar-16 04:10:07

A guy who told me he had dated a pre-op male to female transsexual - not much of a problem there but then went on to to say "you think she would have been better at giving hand jobs" !!

Nelliethenailnipper Tue 08-Mar-16 06:59:16

Pmsl at the 'Asparagus penis'. Can you imagine the same in reverse? 'Well she was a lovely lady but it was her cauliflower vagina that put me off.

lottielou7 Tue 08-Mar-16 07:01:28

GinBunny sad I'm sorry those things happened to you - how awful.

prioritisingfootball Tue 08-Mar-16 11:23:37

YerA grin

I started a thread recently about a guy who bombarded me with abuse because I didn't reply to his text message for all of 90 minutes. He backtracked the following day and told me he loved me. We'd only been on a couple of dates.

Gin I also had a guy try to crash my car when I broke up with him when I was a teenager. Scary shit!

becauseican Tue 08-Mar-16 11:31:27

The one who added me as 'in a relationship' on Facebook - two hours BEFORE our first date! which I then cancelled

Ludways Tue 08-Mar-16 12:46:18

Date at university, woke up around 2am to find him sitting on a chair beside my bed watching me sleep.

PanGalaticGargleBlaster Tue 08-Mar-16 13:08:14

The women who about 40 mins into our first date started planning our future together as clearly we were getting on so well she felt at ease discussing these topics. Apparently we were going to live in West Sussex in a converted barn and have two children, I could commute to work while she worked from home as a writer. Quite how she had time to write as she had ambitions to keep ponies and other random livestock. I did not ask for a desert menu or coffee.

FrenchToast45 Tue 08-Mar-16 13:35:42

I once dated a man in his mid 30s who thought he was about 8. He watched kids programmes, played with lego and liked going to the park. That was pretty creepy. He looked a lot older than 35 too, and had a really deep voice with a strong Yorkshire accent which made him even creepier.

I also dated another man who, whilst I was crying about the recent death of a friend, kept telling me to take my top off. We didn't last long.

Oh, and another guy I was in a relationship with once made a list of all the friends I 'could' and 'couldn't' see, because he felt some of them were a bad influence on me.

Happily single at the moment!

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