Internet settings anyone?

[Justjust811]

We have a child lock setting on our internet I've just saw 4 emails in dh email inbox saying the settings and passwords have been changed, all on different days. I was unaware we had passwords on it? Never been told about this? Dh email on my iPad so was up when I went on it. It was in the 'archived' so he must of tried to delete? I'm confused as to what this is ?

[Justjust811]

I've actually managed to log in and found he's been unblocking different categories when I'm out

[Justjust811]

Done a bit more digging found he's unblocked 'escort sites' category.... I once saw him browsing escort sites a while ago he claimed to be 'looking for wanking material' should I be alarmed or is this a stupid coincidence?

[Justjust811]

Anyone? I can't sleep feel sick dunno if I'm over reacting?

[Abed]

I wasn't even aware that web providers had an 'escort' category, I just thought they had an 'over 18's' category that blocked anything questionable even family planning sites.

I mean how would the settings know what an escort website is as I'm guessing there's literally thousands of them...?

Sorry I have nothing helpful to add but your DH sounds like a twat if he has history.

[Aussiebean]

Hi, I can't really help either, but you maybe able to do some snooping and see if he has actually gone on these sites and how far he has gone.

[Justjust811]

There's different categories he's unblocked 'adult dating, sex and escort sites' that's 1 category but he's also unblocked a category for an hour at a time a few times which could only be the 'pornography' one. It's just the fact he lies so much, he's never told me I can access this via a password etc and he's also told me he doesn't watch porn anymore (had a huge problem with it a while back where we never had sex because he watched so much) I just don't get why this other category is unblocked I typed in escorts and it came straight up! Pictures as well! So angry!

[Justjust811]

Anyone?

[peggyundercrackers]

sorry im unsure what your looking for.

sounds like you have some kind of software installed or a product like BT Parental Controls to try and make the content of the internet safe for a child to use. sounds like your DH has been unblocking different categories so he can view and trying to hide it from you.

[Allnamesaretakenffs]

You need to speak to your husband, and decide whether or not you can live with someone who does this kind of thing.

[Justjust811]

I don't know just want to know this isn't all in my head, he has definitely enabled different things as you can't view porn etc but you can get onto escort sites, casual sex sites and dating sex sites (I typed it into google clicked on them even the pictures come up!) I don't know what he's been looking at now, it's clear he's been looking at something like one of the above and now I just don't understand why, is it to cheat? I'm so sick.

[Justjust811]

I'm sorry for babbling on I just NC and wanted someone to talk to can't in RL

[peggyundercrackers]

your right you can look at dating sites as it is classified under a different category to porn and yes escort sites come under dating not pornography.

why not change the password to something you know and not tell him and see what happens?

[pinkyredrose]

Yes change the password yourself

[Allnamesaretakenffs]

If he's ok with doing something that he knows affects you so much, and goes to such lengths to please himself even after you've discussed it, then it doesn't seem like he will change anytime soon? Are you going to be ok with living with the not-knowing for the rest of your lives together?

[Justjust811]

I said to him this morning 'oh you know that child thing do you have a password so I can use it?' He said yes and told me the password, 1 number missing, said he couldn't remember the username. I just said I wanted to look at lingerie which used to be blocked but it's not now after a search. Why would he do this? What if DC goes on Internet by accident on their tablets!?

[Justjust811]

I can't change password as it'll go through his email to confirm and it pops up on the front of his phone? I'm furious wtf is he doing? Makes me wonder if he's on adult dating sites now :(

[Justaboy]

Justjust811 Don't want to upset you but theres an old adage that says no smoke without fire and by the fact he's doing this indicates an underlying problem. I don't know what web browser you use but if its
Firefox, I won't have any Microsoft internet explorer crap here!, then there may well be a "history" setting and if that's set to "Never remember history" then I bet you as much as you like he's on the lookout for well, no prizes for guessing. If it does remember history then you can see which site or sites he's been viewing.

If he hasn't been "dining out" yet then it seems to me that he's not far off doing so and It will be difficult but i think you shoudl try to nip this one in the bud before it goes too far and your marriage goes bang, to have some serious conversations with him about your relationship.

[Justjust811]

He's got 2 browsers 1 is always deleted completely and the private browsing is used, I've even checked in settings that's wiped clear too. When i logged into the child lock site it has no history on there just a few 'unblocked for an hour' but nothing about what it was so I gather that's porn. I can't stop him watching that he won't. It's just this fucking escort online dating shit. Grr what do I say though? Because how do I say oh I typed in escorts into google just to check?

[Justaboy]

I think you have found your answer there with the no history.

Sorry but there isn't any online escort "dating". Escorts are an euphemism for prostitution.

He might have been just watching a bit of porn on such as Youporn etc that's one thing, sites such as adultwork are another. As said I think he and you should be having some serious communications how you start that is up to you sorry:-(

[peggyundercrackers]

justaboy no history means nothing is a lot of cases - I never leave any history on any computer I work on but it doesn't mean I watch porn all day.

just you don't need to justify why you know - just ask why its been changed and why he gave you a wrong password - it shouldn't be difficult to get to the truth - you have done nothing wrong.

[Justjust811]

No I don't think he's watching porn all day but he is looking at porn regarding the lock going off for an hour at a time. I asked him this morning about porn just in a jokey way and he said I don't watch porn. Why the lies? What is he doing? He's married with kids why is he looking at escorts I know what it will be, I think he's got a problem he's obsessed with this 1 person (I've caught him looking a few times at)

[Justjust811]

I spoke to him by casually saying 'I can view this website on my phone now' he just said it must be a problem with the supplier but I said you can't view porn etc and he just said I've got no idea? I can't really accuse him if I have no evidence?

[ImperialBlether]

Is your marriage happy, OP? He sounds pretty grim, tbh.

[Sweetandsour93]

I would just change the password and see what he does then, I think you really need to talk to him, make it clear you know and if he continues lying then have a long think about where you go from here.

[PamDooveOrangeJoof]

Change the password see what he says. If he mentions it then he would have to admit he was up to something wouldn't he.
I would also change your husband. No good will come of him I'm sorry.

He sounds like an arsehole who is either using sex workers or trying to. he won't admit it he will just get better at hiding it.