OH's cat waking baby

[Edemummy]

My OH has an old cat whom he loves to bits. He was rescued so we don't know his age. Cat is howling day and night, and we have a 6 month old who I try to sleep train. She was sleeping ok until about a month ago when she was woken up by cat at night and since then seemed to have confused day and night. So we've gone backwards and started sleep training all from 0 again. OH doesn't do it as I am the one with baby at home. A few weeks later I managed to get her sleep back into shape more or less and this morning 5:30 cat came upstairs and woke everyone up again, baby didn't fall back asleep and is winging all day, all day naps are all over the place too.

I want to get rid of the cat (to rehome) but also feel like a really horrible person for feeling this way. Am I overreacting?

[lighteningirl]

Yes you are sleep deprived yabvu sorry

[Cabrinha]

Have you spoken to a vet or behaviourist about why the cat has started to howl day and night?

[noddingoff]

Take it to the vet and get it tested for an overactive thyroid (common and treatable)

[thecatneuterer]

noddingoff is absolutely right. A thyroid function test is in order.

[TaurielTest]

Lots of babies' sleep patterns go to pot at 4-6 months (Google sleep regression), it may not all be down to the cat.

[Gracey79]

I don't think a cat waking up would cause confusion in day and night for this long - can it not go outside at night?
Could be teething or lots of other reasons at this age my ds has only recently started sleeping better and he's 11m

[Branleuse]

my cats often wake the family up in the night, so i lock them in the kitchen at night.

Rehoming is a bit excessive

[Cabrinha]

I agree that the sleep may not be that closely linked to the cat. Babies go through phases - this is the start of teething, for example - they're buggers like that!

Is the cat howling to come upstairs? Can she come in a cat bed in your room?

(I'm assuming with the sleep training talk that you've moved baby out of your room - obv if not, don't have the cat in!)

[thecatneuterer]

Again, before even thinking about other options, the first step is to get a thyroid check:
pets.thenest.com/howling-hyperthyroidism-older-cat-11602.html

[LobsterQuadrille]

YABU. Rehoming an old cat would be very stressful for him. I had similar when DD was tiny - had the cat in the room with me and DD in her own room. But as others have said, a visit to the vet and a thyroid test sound the first steps.

[AliceInUnderpants]

Does you OH live with you? If yes, isn't it a family pet, rather than "his cat"?

Take the poor thing to the vet. They should be able to give you an estimate of age too, which you'll need for vet records and boosters.

[Wolpertinger]

My cat howled day and night. It was hyperthyroid. Get it checked by the vet.

[SnozzberryWibble]

I don't think you're overreacting. I don't particularly like cats, and personally I would want the cat gone if it was waking my baby up. I don't even like seeing cats getting close to babies, TBH.

There is a study which shows babies learnt new skills better when they had a nap after practicing a skill for the first time, to me that shows the importance of naps.

[ResetPassword]

I read the title as OH's cat is walking baby

Definitely take to a vet before considering other options

[SirVixofVixHall]

I feel v sorry for the cat! You are a family for a start, but he's been relegated to "OH's cat". Agree, vet check for the howling- but the baby? Babies get used to any regular noise, and their sleep can go pear shaped for any manner of reasons. Very probably nothing at all to do with the cat.

[Atenco]

You cannot rehome an old cat. Some friends of mine were given an old cat that someone had got rid of because of a new baby, the poor cat just stayed in the cupboard, it was permanently upset.

[Edemummy]

Thanks to everyone for the advice!
We will check him out specifically for thyroid problem asap.
We do take him to vets very often, just for a general check up and we always get "all is fine" answer. They cannot determine the age either (had been visiting 2 different vet clinics).
I know I sound very desperate (and cruel), but it what happens to me when my baby finally sleeps at a long stretch and I get some rest only to be woken up. Agree that babies can not sleep for different reasons, but it was clear that she was awaken by the loud howling at all times when it happened.
Will check the moggy out hopefully it is treatable so we can all live peacefully. The cat is the only reason me and Oh ever argue.

[Edemummy]

Yes it is OH's cat he had him before we even met and unfortunately he never took to me and he hates to share OH with anyone. Letting him in bedroom is not an option as he will come to sleep on the bed (head) and then scratch face, especially eyes for attention. Not to mention the piles of hair he leaves, I used to have fur balls when he was allowed to sleep with us.
ResetPassword - that would be great!

[IrianofWay]

How about the suggestion to shut cat in kitchen?

[cbigs]

This is tricky and obvs in extreme cases I could see rehoming but to be honest if my dh asked me to rehome one of my cats Id sooner lose him.... Cat will learn if he is only allowed in certain areas .

[macshoto]

Try Feliway - it's a cat pheromone diffuser that plugs in and releases a calming cat-friendly scent (imperceptible to humans IIRC). We used it to help settle our two cats into a new home after a move halfway around the world and found it to be very effective.

For the £15 or £20 it will cost to try it out, it's a better initial attempt at a solution than trying to rehome an elderly much loved pet.

[Wolpertinger]

Feliway is brilliant - always sorts my two cats out when they are behaving badly or fighting.

Shutting cat in kitchen might be an option depending on layout of your house but if the cat isn't used to it, you might just replace the noise with louder howling and scrabbling as it can't understand why the door is shut - we gave up on the shutting in option with mine as it made the disturbance worse not better.

[AliceInUnderpants]

OP do you plan on having any more children? If so, what happens when one of them wakes the other up? Get rid?

[mix56]

No way should it be on pillows... what about the cot ? Have you even heard of toxoplasmosis ? www.petmd.com/cat/conditions/infectious-parasitic/c_ct_toxoplasmosis
take to vet, & shut the cat in kitchen at night fgs

[MyKingdomForBrie]

I second shutting cat in the kitchen, my cats would never be allowed upstairs at night as of course they would wake everyone; they don't understand you want to be asleep all night!