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Secrets

(7 Posts)
onanotherday Wed 02-Mar-16 10:12:52

Met a man while old. Seemed very nice. But we are very different in many ways but we enjoy each others company. 6 months in and i find out he has a dc that he hasn't mentioned before...I know of his other children. He said never sees dc as exp didn't want him in their lives. Very sad and he is genuinely upset. But has left me uneasy...not to share. Am I being unreasonable?

goddessofsmallthings Wed 02-Mar-16 10:20:39

How many dc does he have and by how many different women? How old is the dc in question? Has he said why the dm of this particular dc doesn't want him their lives and has he challenged this in the courts?

Imo you're right to feel uneasy that he's withheld this information. Do you have dc of your own?

Mummystar123 Wed 02-Mar-16 10:28:27

It depends on the circumstances in which he doesn't see dc. I would feel uneasy but woul probably give him a chance to explain.

onanotherday Wed 02-Mar-16 12:19:11

3 dc by 2 ex's all late teens
.this "new dc" aged 9 by exp that was a short relationship and by his own admission he was not in a good place when they split but since has tried to have input now but as has moved on and doesn't want him involved. My own dc's are 11 twins.

Joysmum Wed 02-Mar-16 13:13:38

In not surprised you feel uneasy, he was history of being an absent father to two families. This as families can 'move on' and still share parenting. What hasn't this happened...twice!

onanotherday Wed 02-Mar-16 13:29:13

No he is involved with all children, just not this one as exp didn't want any contact. Still it's more that it's taken six months to know this that bothers me. Think my decision is made...now how to get out?confused

Bree85 Wed 02-Mar-16 16:31:50

Still he keeps it a secret and did not tell you. It is something to be alarmed. Secrets are not good.

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