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Still moving forward. Bank/fraud now sorted but everything else still the same

(130 Posts)
HoppingForward Sun 28-Feb-16 15:51:29

I now have access to my own account online with his access removed.

I've changed passwords to everything and a new name here. Please don't write my previous NN on here paranoid feel free to PM if you have an idea of the back story for needing to start this new thread.

Still lots to do appointments wise and he is still a stupid bastard playing mind games. But in his mind it's all my doing.

Lostandlonely1979 Sun 28-Feb-16 15:57:47

Don't know your story but really hope you can find a more promising future ahead of what sounds like a very messy time flowers

Joysmum Sun 28-Feb-16 16:27:02

You're doing all the right things. I guess it's a matter of list writing in order of priority and ticking them off 1 by 1.

So glad I've found you again grin flowers

lemonpuff Sun 28-Feb-16 16:28:55

Keep going you can do this. The girls need you

HoppingForward Sun 28-Feb-16 16:39:42

I'm making the girls laugh because I have 1 book with important things to do lists. A diary with appointments and important numbers and passwords and my book to write down phone conversations and stuff I remember.

I don't go anywhere with out them incase I need them in that room.

He had DD3 today. I messaged him beforehand and told him if he puts words in her mouth or doesn't agree with everything she says about us being friends etc he will not be able to see her again/before I've sought legal advice.

it seemed to do the trick because she is back and we have had no tears. Other two still refuse to even text him.

Glad to have found you!

Word to the wise: I thought it was you by the title of the fred. If he's even vaguely clever* (of course he's a moron, but might have a brain cell in some specific ways) and likes browsing, he might be able to, as well. Highly recommend you NC (again!), and start a new fred in the other place, at least for a while.

Hope you're well. Hugs.

IamtheZombie Sun 28-Feb-16 17:47:18

Zombie is still here for you. She can offer a selection of spare hands for you and your girls to hold if you'd like. wink

AcrossthePond55 Sun 28-Feb-16 18:02:59

There you are! I didn't suss you out (Preemptive is smarter than me) I just clicked on it because the title was interesting. But you might consider having this in a quieter place.

Glad things seem to be going better for the girls.

We'll just carry on from here, eh?

HoppingForward Sun 28-Feb-16 18:30:35

Yes, let's stay here for now and see what happens.

Just cooking dinner and getting them all prepared for school <fingers crossed DD2 goes now we hve had time together>

I'm going to be really tough on her if she doesn't though, we were having school problems before this started but I'm hopeful it will be ok

Water heater thingy being fitted on Tuesday, deposit for boiler paid yesterday (by me with my own money) and will find out a date for them fitting it tomorrow.

DD3 is happy, they went to the pictures and she has new shoes for her party easily pleased

It's a nice positive day

And star has found her new safe place, his seat on the sofa grin

Lweji Sun 28-Feb-16 20:03:05

Good to see you sorting things out. Let's hope it stays quiet. smile

BonitaFangita Sun 28-Feb-16 20:11:41

Glad you're having a good day, you sound really positive today. Keep it up, you're doing a brilliant job and will always find support here flowers

AcrossthePond55 Sun 28-Feb-16 20:41:57

Sounds like a lovely peaceful day. The best kind for a Sunday. DH is tinkering on his truck and I'm waiting for the Oscars pre-show MNing. Wish my DiL was here to slag off the stars' dresses. DH just looks at me and says 'who cares?'. He doesn't get it.

Atenco Sun 28-Feb-16 23:08:52

Have you check up on key-loggers yet?

HoppingForward Tue 01-Mar-16 23:12:01

Just a little up date for myself.

We have had no hot water or heating since 19th Feb, it's not been great to say the least but the Emerson thingy was being fitted today for hot water so that was a positive.

Star took an Instant dislike to Emerson man, the other engineers she has just had a look at and the sat in her safe place but this one, she barked and growled at (first time I've heard her bark!)

He did his thing but couldn't finish it so still no hot water, finally ended up with another engineer here at 9.30pm and I have hot water again [smile) and the DC are now asleep.

DD3 has been attending school this week which is great but yesterday "run away" her timing wasn't greatbecause he was due to drop something to the house (he bought a couple of new phone chargers for us) and I ended up seeing him and asking him to drive and try to find her, he did find her but she ran from him.

Anyway, I found where she was and collected her that evening and have arranged to see a private therapist for her tomorrow so let's see if that helps her.

Yesterday was the first time I have seen him since the 4th Feb. he looks so handsome in his work suit all clean shaven and manly whilst I'm unwashed, hair in a bun and haven't worn make up let alone followed my skin routine old age routine since he left.

But you know what? I still feel better off, I can't imagine what life would be like if he had been here with all this boiler shit going on, he certainly wouldn't have been a help.

Things aren't great, I'm not going to lie but I do feel better and I really want to go back to work now.

I know buying the charges are a nice gesture but I just see them as the calm before the storm.

Still no legal aid forms, no WTC contact yet, I have sent the forms off so still waiting, he has paid the bills this month which meant I could pay for the boiler but once C. Do their thing he will turn nasty so I'm just waiting for that.

All I hope is that DD2 responds well to tomorrow's session and that the boiler is actually fitted and working in Friday.

Tartypants Wed 02-Mar-16 00:08:06

I don't know you from your previous thread, so no idea of your back story. But, why has he given you a mobile phone charger? Did you ask for one? Just some of them do come with one of those handy spy bugs fitted...

MissBeaHaving Wed 02-Mar-16 00:32:09

Tartypants is right Hopping,had you asked for chargers?

Some of the devices can do many things,I would check due to history.

Glad you are backthanks

AcrossthePond55 Wed 02-Mar-16 01:13:51

If there is a concern about the charger, you should be able to google the make and model to see if it does anything more than simply charge. But sometimes people that are assholes do do 'nice' things.

I'm sure DD2 will benefit from counseling.

Hope all of you had a nice hot bath tonight.

PovertyPain Wed 02-Mar-16 01:28:11

Like a previous poster said, your total did lead me to you. It might be best to ask mumsnet to edit it. Those that have been following your story will be looking for you, but unfortunately, so will dick head. Strange how he's suddenly playing nice after all the posters piled on and let him know what a fucvker he is. Please don't get taken in by him buying the kids stuff, as he's now playing Mr Nice., probably due to the, deserved, mauling he received.

HoppingForward Wed 02-Mar-16 08:00:56

They are an arsehole buys new official Apple chargers.

I haven't heard a thing from him since and my ex wasnt clever enough to tamper with my home tech stuff a friend husband has checked.

And if he is reading this or anything else I or others post in relationship threads I hope he is learning something about building a new future relationship with his daughters that doesn't include me.

I hear www.dadsnet.com is helpful as well.

We have hot water!!!

Lweji Wed 02-Mar-16 08:39:53

Being nice is part of the script. It's easy when being nice involves buying stuff. It takes very little mental effort.

What they can't do is to be nice for a long time. And to actually be nice when things are not going well.

Just some of them do come with one of those handy spy bugs fitted...

OMFGs, yes! I hadn't even thought about that, but please PLEASE get them checked out. Please stop having "he's too .... to ...." or "he'll never ....". He's surprised you time and again with things you never thought he'd do, and a guy who can do keyloggers* would not hesitate to bug your home some other way.

* have you had this checked out? What was the result?

HoppingForward Wed 02-Mar-16 10:28:48

Very true.

It's all going to hit the fan, I recon he will wait until he knows I'm back at work.

And of course I'm still waiting for the CM & WTC to process my applications so that will need a response, I'm guessing "I paid your bills and you do this to me etc"

I've lived with the D. With no heating or hot water for 2 weeks and paying for private counselling for DD2 plus two birthdays so it's not something I'm going to rise to when, and it will, happens.

I'm having a good day today.

Allnamesaretakenffs Wed 02-Mar-16 10:43:22

I'm so glad you're ok, Hopping, you're amazing - a true hero to your girls smile

Lweji Wed 02-Mar-16 10:57:47

Just had a thought yesterday.

Is there anyway he could get your mail?

shoeaddict83 Wed 02-Mar-16 12:04:00

Was thinking about you and glad i found this thread with an update!
You sound more positive which is great, and good to hear little Star is settled in!
You're doing so well flowers

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