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Should I leave?

(1 Post)
Divorcee1 Sun 28-Feb-16 14:27:53

I started a thread a few weeks ago about stbx and myself.

Things have escalated more now. Basically we have been living in the martial home for the last 8 months whilst separated. We haven't started divorce proceedings yet. I have an appointment with CAB on Thursday to get advice.

I work part time for minimum wage but am hopeful I will get one of the other jobs I am applying for.

Ex has stated she wants us out the house. However talks about the "guilt" she feels about the kids leaving blah blah blah. Not guilty enough to leave though. Things are no longer bearable since this was said. I can't stand to look at her. I always assumed she would leave and not uproot the kids.

She also wants 50/50 access, which is why she wants to keep the house. Because I will "get a council house easily". So she wants space for them to stay with her. The house is in her name.

I was a SAHM for the majority of our relationship. I got a job the week I told her it was over so I could start supporting myself. But financially we couldn't separate as we couldn't afford too. She really won't have the kids 50/50 due to shift work and working away a lot and I have been the main career for the last 10 years. I'm not worried about this. She expects me to be fully flexible around her working weekends etc and so far I have been. However I feel a more permenant visitation schedule is needed. And she needs to commit to set weekends....this is sensible right? I shouldn't be bending over to help her go and see her new partner because it's her weekend with the kids!

She needs to write a letter saying she wants us to leave in order to even be considered for a council house and is dragging her heels about this. As she doesn't want to be painted in a bad light.

I fully intend on leaving because I can't stand to look at her. My question is what do I have a right too? I haven't any savings so kitting out a new home will take some money. Can I take stuff from here? Should I be refusing to leave? I don't want to be stuck with a mortgage I can't afford right now (I had an interview last week and am waiting to hear back).

I have the kids I need her payslips? We don't have a joint bank account, child benefit is paid to me...what do I need to be taking with me document wise for a solicitor? If I can afford one of those!

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