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Did things, and now it's awkward

(63 Posts)
PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 19:50:40

Hi all,

New to the forum. Suggested to join this forum by a friend, who said mumsnet would / will give honest / mature feedback / opinions on what I am about to post.

So got a bit intimate with someone @ work. No full sexual intercourse took place, but foreplay happened. Now things are starting to get a tad awkward @ work, and I am now starting to feel a bit uncomfortable!

Has anyone ever been in such situation before? If so, how did you you overcome this?

Robotgirl Fri 19-Feb-16 19:57:56

Are you single?

Robotgirl Fri 19-Feb-16 19:58:10

Is the other person single?

Eggsandketchup Fri 19-Feb-16 19:59:12

Awkward how?

Doingmyheadin2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:00:11

Do you want this to develop into a relationship or was it a one-off?

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 19-Feb-16 20:01:06

by pretending it never happened and treating them as I always had.

keeping conversation work related blush

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:09:16

Yes, I am . .. BUT I have no idea if he is! That's something he's never disclosed! No idea if he's married . .got a gf . . got kids . . been married, now divorced . I know absolutely nothing!

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:10:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:11:28

After the date I did, but after this noway! So I am trying to remain professional / mature, by being polite / friendly like we were before . . but he's playing childish games .

Fugghetaboutit Fri 19-Feb-16 20:11:59

He sounds like a twat. Ignore him from now on.

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:12:21

. . Even if they decide to 'blab?' . . That is what I am worried about! :/ I know I should have thought about that before I even embarked on it, but I didn't think it would turn sour a week later! He genuinely came across as a nice, friendly guy . .

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:13:30

I am now lol

It just doesn't make sense to me, but I guess that's men for you! You have a bit of a fumble, and they carry on like they don't even know who you are! I was quite happy to just brush it under carpet and move on. But he's making a big deal out of nothing.

HandyWoman Fri 19-Feb-16 20:16:30

He's a knobhead. Pretend it never happened. Ignore him as much as work allows. I'm sure it'll blow over (no actual pun intended) lesson learned, hopefully.

Onwards!

Greengardenpixie Fri 19-Feb-16 20:38:23

Maybe he didnt mean to ignore you and he was busy. Maybe now he thinks you are being stand offish? Maybe you could try putting it to the test by saying hi. If he doesnt respond, he clearly is being a prat.
However, I think you still need to clear the air.
You need to talk to him. Maybe he is ignoring you because he is in a relationship and doesn't know how to handle the situation at work. Otherwise, its going to be awkward.

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:39:34

Yes, that's what I am trying to do; act and remain professional when I bump into him. But he's the one making a big deal out of . . nothing! lol It was a bit of fun, that's it!

Just feel really embarrassed, and I hope he doesn't start discussing what happened with people!

Greengardenpixie Fri 19-Feb-16 20:43:17

Did you go out on a date? Or did this just happen in the office?

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:45:27

I reckon there's a wife / gf on the scene, and that's why he's being shady!? That's ok, just say, and I will walk away from it. But I do agree something needs to be said to clear the air, otherwise it's going to get worse! I'm quite happy to brush it under the carpet and move on from it.

I'm really not the type of woman to cause drama out of things; I tend to walk away and move on with my life.

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:46:17

Yes, went on one date!

Greengardenpixie Fri 19-Feb-16 20:48:54

If you went on a date, it seems very strange behaviour as it didnt 'just happen' It was planned iykwim.

Tell him you want a word and ask him what is going on.

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:52:23

It's 'thee' most strangest behaviour I have ever experienced with a guy I've been on one date with! I'm so chilled / relaxed with things, I couldn't care less really where things went. If it was a mistake, that's fine - we all make them in life and learn from it. But just talk to me lol

I want to talk it out, but I doubt very much he'll talk to me! He hasn't responded to my message from earlier in the week either. But not chasing as not into chasing men!

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 20:53:18

. . We didn't have sexual intercourse! I made sure that didn't happen as I thought noway on a first date! But the fumblings I didn't want to happen . . but the mood caught us both! hmm

Greengardenpixie Fri 19-Feb-16 21:00:42

I think its better to clear the air.
If he doesn't talk to you he is a complete arse.

Greengardenpixie Fri 19-Feb-16 21:01:29

Its his issue, not yours.
You sound completely professional. Its his problem.

PurpleLilac2016 Fri 19-Feb-16 21:12:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Theendispie Fri 19-Feb-16 21:22:24

I always remember a much older colleague telling me that dating at work was always a risk and his parting wisdom was 'never shit on your own doorstep'

Just talk about work stuff and say good morning.

Not excusing him but wondering if he is avoiding because he doesn't want a second date.

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