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Marriage counselling

(4 Posts)
Treeskater Fri 12-Feb-16 22:17:34

DH and I have been married nearly 10 years and have two DC (5 and 3). On the whole things are good and we have fun. He makes me laugh and can be very thoughtful and considerate. But there are times when he disengages. He can sulk for a long time over something very petty and seems to resent having to spend time on his own with the children. We both work full time but I do the lion's share of housework and looking after the children. This rankles but most of the time I accept it and we bowl along. Every now and then though I start to question how happy I am. I don't want to leave him but there are creases I'd like to iron out and I'd like him to truly appreciate all that I do for him and the children. Would counselling help us? He's not big on talking about his feelings but I think he needs to be open to the idea that we need a bit of help. Otherwise I worry that the periods of sadness on my part may become frequent enough to be a problem. I DO love him but there are times that I question how long I can carry on bottling it all up and not having a proper conversation about anything. Sorry for waffling. It's been a long day of sulks and I'm so tired.

Balders74 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:24:28

Do you think he would agree to attend counselling? Maybe you could go on your own so that you don't have to bottle up those feelings.

Unfortunately if you don't deal with them then the resentment may build to a detrimental point in your marriage.

Treeskater Fri 12-Feb-16 22:29:21

I hadn't thought of going on my own. Perhaps that would help me unload a bit but I would still like him to hear how I feel. He doesn't listen when I try to tell him. I think he brushes it off a bit as me be over emotional (it's hard not to be when he's sulking for hours/days. It gets to me in the end). I have no idea how to find a counsellor or how much they cost.

Balders74 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:36:30

Maybe start by going to see your GP & ask if they can recommend someone.

Work on getting yourself in a better place. He sounds childish with the sulking. My STBXH was a sulker. They are little boys who are trying to get their own way.

Find out if he will go to counselling & if he says no then make it clear you will be going to see someone anyway. Good luck flowers

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