I dont know how to live life......!

[SoThatHappened]

Just that really. I may drip feed this one as I am on my way out at the moment. But has anyone ever lost the ability to know how live their life anymore? Or never really knew in the first place.

It has come about as I've just coasted through alot of life really, not really going for it. I mean in terms of social life. Professionally I was focused and never gave up.

Alot of my childhood was a write off, just living adult problems and being made to sort them out and not being allowed to have a normal life as a child and teen and I guess that carried over into adulthood. I just dont bother with life alot of the time and just waste time without realising it.

I have built up my life to look how I wanted it to not so long ago, but I lost it all again and now have to build it all up and am struggling.

I am probably rambling here but whatever. I dont know where to go from here.

Also I am a namechanger. Had the unfortunate experience of someone finding out who i was in real life, they used my laptop, without permission. If you've figured out or figure out who I used to be, please dont say my old name on here.

[Marchate]

Can you say roughly what age group you are in?

There comes a time when we realise there are fewer years ahead than behind & our poor choices (and those of our families) haunt us

[SoThatHappened]

Over 35.

I've just done nothing personally with my life. No long term relationships, just a string of crap guys and 3 of them have cheated on me.

Not much social life. I was kept at home instead of school for much of it.

I built my life up to be everything I wanted it to be, then ost it all, break, redundancy, etc.

Now I cant afford a home alone, I need to pool resources with someone to get a mortgage but have no partner.

I feel destined to live out my days alone.