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Asked out by someone you don't feel that way about

(9 Posts)
Iloveyoutilltheend Sun 07-Feb-16 23:37:43

Just wondered had you ever been in this situation? And did it still make you feel like of flattered?

Probably a bit of both, but for me, more uncomfortable than otherwise. I'd at least worry about how to let him down easily. And worse if I got any "creep" vibes offa him.

Sooooo, you want to tell us about yours, right? grin

RiceCrispieTreats Mon 08-Feb-16 00:31:44

No, not flattered: too focused on how I was going to phrase my "thanks but no".

Iloveyoutilltheend Mon 08-Feb-16 06:40:46

Well yes it did happen. Ex work colleague/friend, relatively casual situation. He kind of offered me a way out verbally and then answered his own question so wasn't too awkward. But then he seemed highly embarassed the next time we ran into each other.I think he has self-confidence issues so frankly was surprised he asked me out in the first place

Groovee Mon 08-Feb-16 06:57:55

I felt really uncomfortable. I hadn't realised he felt that way and I only saw him as a friend. Was a bit gutted as it was the end of the friendship.

HelpfulChap Mon 08-Feb-16 07:07:52

I always feel a little bit sorry for the 'asker' they have probably been mulling it over and working their way up to the event for weeks expecting the worst but hoping for the best.

And unfortunately it usually does end the friendship. But if the 'askee' is just not feeling it there is nowhere for it to go.

One time (look, I'm not "all that", but it happens, ya know?) truly pissed me off. He actually used the words " more than just friends". I hate that. My friends are and always were very important: casual lovers were not (and this was in our 20s, when nobody was thinking about marriage). And, if he purported to be my friend, he would/should have known that's how I felt about it.

Anybody else feel like that?

MadeMan Tue 09-Feb-16 16:49:56

Yes it's happened to me in the past and it is nice to be asked, but it is sometimes a bit awkward afterwards; especially when one woman thought I'd changed my mind later on when I was only trying to be polite.

In my experiences it's generally best to try and steer clear of the other person after turning someone down, or after being turned down.

velourvoyageur Tue 09-Feb-16 19:23:23

Several times & I've also been rejected once, the first time I ever did grin

It happens. Another crush is found, all is well!

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