Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

How do I ask her about her Dad (poss Trigger)

(2 Posts)
iamjustlurking Sun 07-Feb-16 08:50:50

I have mulled this over for a while now and still no closer to a conclusion.

When I was about 8yrs old I went to a friends house for tea we were knelt down leaning over a coffee table playing a game. Her dad knelt down behind me and put his hands up my top and kind of rubbed my back then moved his hands around. I initially just froze and then jumped and said I remembered I had to go home.

I never told anyone and to my now shame just dropped the friend and never spoke to her again. She was always a very meek and quiet child, we ended up at the same senior school but our paths never really crossed she was always very reserved

As I got older I always wondered if he "touched" her but how do you ask and wonder if she suffered alone ?

I haven't seen or heard from her for 30 odd yrs then through the power of FB and a web of coincidence we got back in touch.

Now my dilemma, do I bring up the subject, do I ask if her dad is about or do I just leave alone. Could my asking her open a flood gate or could it be the 1st step in her being able to confide (if indeed it is the case) ?

We have briefly chatted she is no longer local, am I wanting resolution for me am I being selfish ? I feel so bad for just dropping her now.

AlwaysHopeful1 Sun 07-Feb-16 09:00:59

I'm sorry that happened to you but I don't think you should ask her that. It's been 30 years and you aren't close at all. I don't see how you can ask something that will have a huge impact on her life, especially if nothing happened to her.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: