Ty for taking the time to read my post
I posted a thread earlier this week "desperate help needed" , and I received several really helpful responses.
I took the advice and I have been trying harder to give my wife "space"
I have only been texting once a day as originally agreed with her.
( I did have one lapse when there was a LOT of black ice and I text her
" be safe " - to which she later replied i'm at work and ok )
I then decided that I wasn't being fair and perhaps I should just cut all contact for now as she was just replying " yes/ no / ok " to whatever I wrote in my texts.
So yesterday the 14th I did not text her all day I was quite proud of myself and I began to focus more on my daughter and myself.
I had a good evening and did lots of positive things.
Then at lunchtime today I had a text asking " Do you think you will be able to bring over x,y and z next week please "
The text had one kiss at the end.
I looked in my history - sad I know and she had not put a text on the last 15 texts.
My immediate reaction was to text straight back " yes of course "
but I didn't. I thought no I will just text her at 18:00 ish as I had been doing before.
I then received a 2nd text exactly 1 hour later saying
" You ok, or are you not talking to me at all ? "
So I then began to type a response, but before I had drafted it my phone rang and it was my wife.
She then proceeded to ask me the same thing again, and we had a conversation approx. 15 / 20 minutes.
during this she stated that can cope with us texting once a day, but is not ready to meet me " at the moment "
( since the week before Christmas we had been seeing each other once a week at her suggestion )
I then sent her my drafted text
" i'm ok. i'm just trying to respect your request to text less.
I've only just seen your last 2 texts. i'm happy to bring over
your books one day next week just let me know "
I'm now more confused than ever. I was trying to let her have her space and also let myself gain some perspective
Is her wanting me to text once a day positive ?
Does "at the moment" - really mean that ?
its SO hard to get context from a text message / phone call when you cant see facial expression
when i'm more " centered " I know its a 10% chance we may get back together and that its more likely she is just pacifying me for now,
then something like this happens and it makes a small spark of hope and sets my emotions racing
comments / suggestions please
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
More - Desperate help needed
dadneedshelp72 · 15/01/2016 14:51
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